Here it goes:
I started seeing the psychologist about 6 months ago because I was feeling really depressed (had a lot of emotional problems). Turns out that my depression stemmed from a hypersensitivity to criticism (interesting because I work in a position known for being at the top of the most stressful jobs list - Master Control of a television station ), which most likely started because I really hated myself deep down for being so different from everyone. I was taller, I had uncontrollable twitches (only slightly better now), and then I realized I was gay (which really put me over the edge and I thought a few times about suicide). We went through all of that and are now dealing with my self-defeating nature. I'm trying to become more comfortable with myself, at least enough to be able to meet other guys (not for sex necessarily) and maybe one day build a relationship with someone.
It's been fun getting more involved in the "gay culture." I can see some of the little, seemingly innocent things that straight people say and how my views on everything have changed. Engagement announcements almost make me angry now because I know that I may never be able to do that and if I do have a "ceremony" that it'll probably be met with more opposition than anyone out there knows - I've heard of people receiving threats, family members disowning their sons/daughters, and some members threatening legal action of some sort, plus mom will either not show up or be there crying. That is just one item, there are a lot of seemingly innocent things our straight friends talk to us about that just dig a little deeper (raising kids is the next most common one I think).
Anyways, that's the end of my rant, I feel a little better now.
I started seeing the psychologist about 6 months ago because I was feeling really depressed (had a lot of emotional problems). Turns out that my depression stemmed from a hypersensitivity to criticism (interesting because I work in a position known for being at the top of the most stressful jobs list - Master Control of a television station ), which most likely started because I really hated myself deep down for being so different from everyone. I was taller, I had uncontrollable twitches (only slightly better now), and then I realized I was gay (which really put me over the edge and I thought a few times about suicide). We went through all of that and are now dealing with my self-defeating nature. I'm trying to become more comfortable with myself, at least enough to be able to meet other guys (not for sex necessarily) and maybe one day build a relationship with someone.
It's been fun getting more involved in the "gay culture." I can see some of the little, seemingly innocent things that straight people say and how my views on everything have changed. Engagement announcements almost make me angry now because I know that I may never be able to do that and if I do have a "ceremony" that it'll probably be met with more opposition than anyone out there knows - I've heard of people receiving threats, family members disowning their sons/daughters, and some members threatening legal action of some sort, plus mom will either not show up or be there crying. That is just one item, there are a lot of seemingly innocent things our straight friends talk to us about that just dig a little deeper (raising kids is the next most common one I think).
Anyways, that's the end of my rant, I feel a little better now.