# Advices Needed!



## theCaptn' (Mar 28, 2013)

My benching days are over until I fix my shoulder, my forearms kill every time I curl.
Im way too fat around my middle and cruising is making me depressed. 

I guess I could :

strangle a hooker . . . ban someone popular and influencial like KOS. . . learn how to auto-fellate myself again . . . buy a prius like d-lats does .  . . 

Any other advices to fix these ailments?


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## HialeahChico305 (Mar 28, 2013)

Ban DGG, you will feel much better


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## KILLEROFSAINTS (Mar 28, 2013)

why do people thin they have to bench? there are way better chest moves...and you are no good at it anyway


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## theCaptn' (Mar 28, 2013)

KILLEROFSAINTS said:


> why do people thin they have to bench? there are way better chest moves...and you are no good at it anyway



I was making the best progress of my life - from 85kg to 110kg in 4 months - all incline. Made some major upper body gains too, which I needed as Im too leg heavy. It's probably time for a change I guess.


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## Watson (Mar 28, 2013)

theCaptn' said:


> My benching days are over until I fix my shoulder, my forearms kill every time I curl.
> Im way too fat around my middle and cruising is making me depressed.
> 
> I guess I could :
> ...



close your eyes for 10 minutes,

clear every thought from your head,

concentrate as hard as u can,

imagine you are Azza, no job, no money, life has passed u by, wife has 1 tooth, banned all over the place (gyms and interweb boards), a laughing stock at best, pedo record listed in interpol,

now open ur eyes and look in the mirror

mother fucken sunniest brightest day of your life when u realise it was only in ur mind!!!!

gich bro!


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## Watson (Mar 28, 2013)

theCaptn' said:


> I was making the best progress of my life - from 85kg to 110kg in 4 months - all incline. Made some major upper body gains too, which I needed as Im too leg heavy. It's probably time for a change I guess.



nice work captn 

pity ull go all past and pale if u dont find a way to work out


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## jadean (Mar 28, 2013)

Have you tried DECA or npp to help with the pain? High volume will be much easier on the body until your healed up,


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## theCaptn' (Mar 28, 2013)

Azza makes a great pet fish! But there's no fun in humping him. 

I would like to tie him up and get the GF to pee on him. then coat his pee pee with vegemite before setting the dogs loose


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## theCaptn' (Mar 28, 2013)

jadean said:


> Have you tried DECA or npp to help with the pain? High volume will be much easier on the body until your healed up,



I was on deca bro - 400-600mg. It doesn't do much for me injury wise


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## KILLEROFSAINTS (Mar 28, 2013)

fuck even pretending to be azza....how could you griff


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## azza1971 (Mar 29, 2013)

theCaptn' said:


> My benching days are over until I fix my shoulder, my forearms kill every time I curl.
> Im way too fat around my middle and cruising is making me depressed.
> 
> I guess I could :
> ...



learn to isolate the chest, take the shoulders out.

same with curls, isolate

or dont workout, quit your job and go on welfare, then you can be like Griff


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## charley (Mar 29, 2013)

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^    ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

.......advice from Dr. Azza..


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## theCaptn' (Mar 29, 2013)

azza1971 said:


> learn to isolate the chest, take the shoulders out.
> 
> same with curls, isolate
> 
> or dont workout, quit your job and go on welfare, then you can be like Griff



Lol thanks Azza. I hadn't thought of that.

You're 20+ yrs of experience really helps me out 

The only curls I can do is cable with a rope - start wrist neutral like a hammer and supine them as I raise the rope.


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## Rednack (Mar 29, 2013)

theCaptn' said:


> My benching days are over until I fix my shoulder, my forearms kill every time I curl.
> Im way too fat around my middle and cruising is making me depressed.
> 
> I guess I could :
> ...


Go get you some nice breast implants, let your hair grow out and start taking it up the ass like a real man...
no worries?


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## theCaptn' (Mar 29, 2013)

Rednack said:


> Go get you some nice breast implants, let your hair grow out and start taking it up the ass like a real man...
> no worries?



Well picture this, I'm thinning on top of my head, so I clip my hair short. If I let it grow, just the sides do like sideshow bob. The implants would be a nice touch I guess, I'd look like a well charming pre-op tran


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## Swfl (Mar 29, 2013)

id say a three day blow and hooker bender should do the trick.  how did that all work out anyway for your bday?
But seriously, if you cant lift heavy anymore just stop all together, you will one day anyway... May i suggest model airplanes or crochete, or shuffle board with the rest of the broken down gear abusers, you could put togehter a league!!! it would be awsome!


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## Rednack (Mar 29, 2013)

theCaptn' said:


> Well picture this, I'm thinning on top of my head, so I clip my hair short. If I let it grow, just the sides do like sideshow bob. The implants would be a nice touch I guess, I'd look like a well charming pre-op tran


I'd check into it no shit, with an ass like urs it could become very prosperous...


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## theCaptn' (Mar 29, 2013)

Swfl said:


> id say a three day blow and hooker bender should do the trick.  how did that all work out anyway for your bday?
> But seriously, if you cant lift heavy anymore just stop all together, you will one day anyway... May i suggest model airplanes or crochete, or shuffle board with the rest of the broken down gear abusers, you could put togehter a league!!! it would be awsome!



We looked into that. Quality hookers are like 600/hr blow is about the same a gram. Me and the mrs realized a one night bender would pay for a ticket to Vegas, where the hookers and blow are more affordable.

Btw, does the clock start when you're fucking or when you arrive? Ideally you'd want to loosen up with a few drinks and laughs, but I'm not paying 600 for the privilege. The other option is to walk in there and start hammering away


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## Swfl (Mar 29, 2013)

theCaptn' said:


> We looked into that. Quality hookers are like 600/hr blow is about the same a gram. Me and the mrs realized a one night bender would pay for a ticket to Vegas, where the hookers and blow are more affordable.
> 
> Btw, does the clock start when you're fucking or when you arrive? Ideally you'd want to loosen up with a few drinks and laughs, but I'm not paying 600 for the privilege. The other option is to walk in there and start hammering away



The girl,or guy you'd be punding dont give a shit it's work to them ya know.  Thats like the average person being told to go dig a hole or load a shelf, they dont need drinks and shit to get em in the mood they just do it so they can get that check... i'd say punch em in the mouth bend em over and fuck'em quick, then ask for a discount... 

BTW hookers are illegal in vegas, you have to go about 2hrs north of vegas for the legal ones.  don't get me wrong there are plenty of hookers in vegas, but if your looking to minimize you legal exposure go north.


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## theCaptn' (Mar 29, 2013)

Lol my GF wants to do it all classy. Hell it's her idea so ill along with whatever. I told her to pick the girl and orchestrate activities - that way I can't do no wrong


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## dieseljimmy (Mar 29, 2013)

theCaptn' said:


> We looked into that. Quality hookers are like 600/hr blow is about the same a gram. Me and the mrs realized a one night bender would pay for a ticket to Vegas, where the hookers and blow are more affordable.
> 
> Btw, does the clock start when you're fucking or when you arrive? Ideally you'd want to loosen up with a few drinks and laughs, but I'm not paying 600 for the privilege. The other option is to walk in there and start hammering away



600 a gram!?! Fuck that I don't care if the shit is pure and uncut.  Best way to get marching powder in Vegas is to ask the cab drivers.


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## Rednack (Mar 29, 2013)

Fuckit....bann kos


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## theCaptn' (Mar 29, 2013)

dieseljimmy said:


> 600 a gram!?! Fuck that I don't care if the shit is pure and uncut.  Best way to get marching powder in Vegas is to ask the cab drivers.



Australia prices bro. It's criminal!

I was down in Nicaragua years ago and a fist full cost me $20 from the fisherman! Bluewaters on the Caribbean side - damn pirates nest took 2 days by river boat and buses on fkd up goat tracks to get there


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## dieseljimmy (Mar 29, 2013)

theCaptn' said:


> Australia prices bro. It's criminal!
> 
> I was down in Nicaragua years ago and a fist full cost me $20 from the fisherman! Bluewaters on the Caribbean side - damn pirates nest took 2 days by river boat and buses on fkd up goat tracks to get there



300 a gram would be criminal. 600 is an gaping ass rape.

You have that fishermans cell?


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## [SIL] (Mar 29, 2013)

azza1971 said:


> learn to isolate the chest, take the shoulders out.
> 
> same with curls, isolate
> 
> or dont workout, quit your job and go on welfare, then you can be like Griff


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## Rednack (Mar 29, 2013)

[SIL] said:


>


Looks like he's been doing a lot of isolating lately...


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## [SIL] (Mar 29, 2013)

yes..isolating children


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## azza1971 (Mar 29, 2013)

where are sils pics? apparently he looks so good we dont even qualify to look.


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## theCaptn' (Mar 29, 2013)

azza1971 said:


> where are sils pics? apparently he looks so good we dont even qualify to look.



I will pm them thru to you.


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## HFO3 (Mar 29, 2013)

Serious Answer:
First few things I would do:
1. Lighten your weight reasonably, 50% of 1RM might be a great place to start for you.
2. Keep your elbows semi tucked by your side while working your chest, not 90 degrees out from your body(this will also work anterior delt, so what.) take 40(at first)-60(work towards that) seconds of your pecs being under tension to complete each SET of a chest exercise. This is VERY difficult to do, if it's easy, you're doing it wrong or you need to shorten the rest and add a few lbs. Take very short rests between sets, start with 30 seconds, setting the goal to be 10 seconds between sets.
_3. Stop using barbells, period._ Yes, they do work, but they are negligible if your injured.
4. _No dips, period._
5. _Do all pressing motions with elbows out in front,_ more in a tucked postion, not a 90 degrees to side of your body, assuming that's what you're doing. It's very common...
6. Stay simple use flat and a low incline, cables are fine too. Personally, I would warm up with super setting limited ROM cables with low inclines coupled with rotator cuff exercises using a 5lb DB to benchmark and increase blood flow prior to moving forward with your chest training.

Just an FYI- 
Ironically, it's the elbows out form which places greater tension on the pec that creates the width and pec growth. This also stresses the RC and shoulder joint which is one common facet of many possibilities of how most RC/shoulder injuries are caused in the first place.
 I would guess you love or loved dips at one point> This is a great exercise for building upper body and the worst exercise you can do for your RC/shoulder. It is rarely done correctly and almost sure to cause/irritate an injury at some point. Dips should alway be done in front of you, never behind.  The rotation is too great even for the shoulder, decline presses are also mechanically incorrect for your RC/shoulder as well

Keep us posted C.


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## XXL (Mar 29, 2013)

u def need to choke a bitch out, one who deserves it of course, and then take that monkey to pound town. Give her a jelly donut... ya know, when u bust a nut in her face then punch her in the mouth?


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## XYZ (Mar 29, 2013)

LHJO AT MINIMUM 4 times a day.

Take some time away from the gym to rest and recover.  Your not going to lose much of anything if you're cruising and eating clean.  If that doesn't work for you cut down on the overall volume.  If you're doing 15-12 total sets for a large muscle group (legs, back, chest) cut it back to about 9 or so.

Good luck bro!


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## [SIL] (Mar 29, 2013)

training while injured is just plain stupid..taking few weeks off not gonna cause you to loose muscle contrary it will result in better gains when you start training again..keep your calories while on break and you will be ok..also get hydrolysed collagen and milk colostrum for healing injuries..also can get deer velvet antler..


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## Zaphod (Mar 29, 2013)

theCaptn' said:


> My benching days are over until I fix my shoulder, my forearms kill every time I curl.
> Im way too fat around my middle and cruising is making me depressed.
> 
> I guess I could :
> ...



You're fucked in the realm of shoulders until you get them fixed.  Try tendonitis fixes for the forearms.  Lay off the sodas and do some cardio for the gut.  For the stress and depression buy guns and shoot the fuck out of them.

Failing all that try some hookers and blow.


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## HFO3 (Mar 29, 2013)

FOR SOME clarity on my post:

Actually, many people train with *slight levels* of pain for various reasons. Personally, I know people that "time off" will not change their situation. My post is assuming this isn't a recent injury, but rather one that has developed over time and he is needing a "revamp" so to speak on his training philosophy. One that will enable him to train with at best no pain or at least less pain. Anyway, I want make this point clear, I would not recommend anyone train with pain form a recent injury or re-aggravated one, Re-hab may also be in order here. I suppose we need more info? Captain?


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## Bowden (Mar 29, 2013)

azza1971 said:


> learn to isolate the chest, take the shoulders out.



Isolate the chest and take the shoulders out?
How do you not engage the frontal delts during a bench or dumb bell press?
Even on a dumb bell  fly they assist during the move, they are synergists on that move.


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## Bowden (Mar 29, 2013)

Azza,
I need to isolate my right outer delt and left inner Iliopsoas fibers.
Any suggestions on how to isolate both of them?


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## SheriV (Mar 29, 2013)

HFO3 said:


> Serious Answer:
> First few things I would do:
> 1. Lighten your weight reasonably, 50% of 1RM might be a great place to start for you.
> 2. Keep your elbows semi tucked by your side while working your chest, not 90 degrees out from your body(this will also work anterior delt, so what.) take 40(at first)-60(work towards that) seconds of your pecs being under tension to complete each SET of a chest exercise. This is VERY difficult to do, if it's easy, you're doing it wrong or you need to shorten the rest and add a few lbs. Take very short rests between sets, start with 30 seconds, setting the goal to be 10 seconds between sets.
> ...




^^^ I've actually had o do all of the above for a torn rotator cuff, which takes an incredibly long time to heal properly because of the lack of blood flow to the tissues

I'm a cancer survivor so GH is out for me, but I would recommend that for you if you're not on it already
also physical therapy and stretching is pretty key

its an area of the body that will only further degrade if you don't pamper it for a bit (think a few months)


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## Rednack (Mar 29, 2013)

SheriV said:


> ^^^ I've actually had o do all of the above for a torn rotator cuff, which takes an incredibly long time to heal properly because of the lack of blood flow to the tissues
> 
> I'm a cancer survivor so GH is out for me, but I would recommend that for you if you're not on it already
> also physical therapy and stretching is pretty key
> ...


Why does it burn when I pee?


And why is the sky blue?


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## Bowden (Mar 29, 2013)

theCaptn' said:


> My benching days are over until I fix my shoulder, my forearms kill every time I curl.
> Im way too fat around my middle and cruising is making me depressed.
> 
> I guess I could :
> ...



Never screw around with a shoulder issue and think that you can work through it.
Consider stopping all upper body work until you heal up.
If you don't you may aggravate the shoulder problems and cause more extensive shoulder damage.

As to your curls, it sounds like tendonitis.
If so then rest is the only cure.


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## KILLEROFSAINTS (Mar 29, 2013)

XYZ said:


> LHJO AT MINIMUM 4 times a day.
> 
> Take some time away from the gym to rest and recover.  Your not going to lose much of anything if you're cruising and eating clean.  If that doesn't work for you cut down on the overall volume.  If you're doing 15-12 total sets for a large muscle group (legs, back, chest) cut it back to about 9 or so.
> 
> Good luck bro!


 should be 9 or so anyway


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## KILLEROFSAINTS (Mar 29, 2013)

SheriV said:


> ^^^ I've actually had o do all of the above for a torn rotator cuff, which takes an incredibly long time to heal properly because of the lack of blood flow to the tissues
> 
> I'm a cancer survivor so GH is out for me, but I would recommend that for you if you're not on it already
> also physical therapy and stretching is pretty key
> ...



IS there anything she cant do!?


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## s2h (Mar 29, 2013)

azza1971 said:


> learn to isolate the chest, take the shoulders out.
> 
> same with curls, isolate
> 
> or dont workout, quit your job and go on welfare, then you can be like Griff



Hey numb nuts...it'd his bicep tendon that's the issue..isolation isn't gonna help..go back to dry humping your Winnie the pooh blankie and don't give training advice...


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## s2h (Mar 29, 2013)

Cpt...I have similar issues....A.R.T.(active release)once we and you will be like new...trust me it works...oh and 4 ius of GH...


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## KILLEROFSAINTS (Mar 29, 2013)

s2h said:


> Hey numb nuts...it'd his bicep tendon that's the issue..isolation isn't gonna help..go back to dry humping your Winnie the pooh blankie and don't give training advice...



I know right? what the fuck


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## Rednack (Mar 29, 2013)

s2h said:


> Hey numb nuts...it'd his bicep tendon that's the issue..isolation isn't gonna help..go back to dry humping your Winnie the pooh blankie and don't give training advice...





theCaptn' said:


> My benching days are over until I fix my shoulder, my forearms kill every time I curl.


Don't see shit about a bicep dickweed..
nice face plant..


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## SheriV (Mar 29, 2013)

Rednack said:


> Why does it burn when I pee?
> 
> 
> And why is the sky blue?




pee hole burn...who knows, dirty whores? 

the sky is blue because of how light reflects off of O3 (its what comes through the prism spectrum? or something to that effect)

^^^ I could be wrong though cuz thats off the top of my head


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## s2h (Mar 29, 2013)

Rednack said:


> Don't see shit about a bicep dickweed..
> nice face plant..


Listen you inbreed trailer living fat fuck....he has normal signs of bicep tendon issues...it runs thru your shoulder into your forearm....fatty..


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## Rednack (Mar 29, 2013)

I'm gonna have to start staying at a holiday inn express...

Lol@sheriv shooting lightening bolts from his ass...


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## SheriV (Mar 29, 2013)

I was half right

Why is the sky blue? :: NASA's The Space Place


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## Rednack (Mar 29, 2013)

SheriV said:


> I was half right
> 
> Why is the sky blue? :: NASA's The Space Place



Most transgenders like yourself are always half right..

Debate is which half...


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## SheriV (Mar 29, 2013)

*rolls her eyes*


you'd be much happier if I had a cawk wouldn't you


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## Rednack (Mar 29, 2013)

Ur the one whoo'd jump for joy if you had a cawk..

Bet that bedpost is catching hell huh?


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## SheriV (Mar 29, 2013)

the man catches hell...but thank you for your concern 

I think having a cawk would be handy for peeing, that's about it


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## Rednack (Mar 29, 2013)

Lose some weight and it'll take a lot of strees off them knees during urination..


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## Dark Geared God (Mar 29, 2013)

theCaptn' said:


> My benching days are over until I fix my shoulder, my forearms kill every time I curl.
> Im way too fat around my middle and cruising is making me depressed.
> 
> I guess I could :
> ...








yOu are fat I'v seen this.In R/L....You have had to many cheesy dog mah nigga


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## theCaptn' (Mar 29, 2013)

Bowden said:


> Never screw around with a shoulder issue and think that you can work through it.
> Consider stopping all upper body work until you heal up.
> If you don't you may aggravate the shoulder problems and cause more extensive shoulder damage.
> 
> ...



this is a reaggravation of an old shoulder injury - Ive caught it early, I got some physio and accupuncture lined up. 

I'll be laying off the pressing for at least 3 months I guess. I got a few exercises I can work with, but cardio and core work will be my focus.

Thanks for all the advices, especially Azza!. Hopefully he'll be teeing me up with a diet and training plan


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## azza1971 (Mar 30, 2013)

Bowden said:


> Azza,
> I need to isolate my right outer delt and left inner Iliopsoas fibers.
> Any suggestions on how to isolate both of them?



yeah, pull ya cock with the other hand numbnuts


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## heckler7 (Mar 30, 2013)

hire a hooker and have her do curls and incline bench for you, fapp while shes lifting, than strangle her. GICH


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## secdrl (Mar 30, 2013)

theCaptn' said:


> My benching days are over until I fix my shoulder, my forearms kill every time I curl.
> Im way too fat around my middle and cruising is making me depressed.
> 
> I guess I could :
> ...


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## azza1971 (Mar 30, 2013)

theCaptn' said:


> this is a reaggravation of an old shoulder injury - Ive caught it early, I got some physio and accupuncture lined up.
> 
> I'll be laying off the pressing for at least 3 months I guess. I got a few exercises I can work with, but cardio and core work will be my focus.
> 
> Thanks for all the advices, especially Azza!. Hopefully he'll be teeing me up with a diet and training plan



i have lots of good advice and tips, i just dont practice it when i cant, bit like Roellys Grandma trainer


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## heavyiron (Mar 30, 2013)

See a doc
Take time off from training
resume training and figure out what excercises don't hurt it.


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## azza1971 (Mar 30, 2013)

heavyiron said:


> See a doc
> Take time off from training
> resume training and figure out what excercises don't hurt it.



do you train legs?


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## Dark Geared God (Mar 30, 2013)




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## XYZ (Apr 2, 2013)

azza1971 said:


> do you train legs?



^^do you ever tell the truth?


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## OTG85 (Apr 4, 2013)

Take your side hair and comb it over the top.Btw the captn quit gears and training and checked into some hostile boathouse and is Mia


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## heckler7 (Mar 18, 2016)




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