# Breaking Bad Habits...



## jstar (Mar 10, 2004)

I've spent the past few days reflecting on my life and my goals, particularly what I want to achieve with my diet/fitness goals. I have come to the conclusion that I really needed to take stock and figure out why I can't seem to make it through the week without bingeing. The past few days I have realized that I am obsessed in a bad way with my diet so much so that it causes me a lot more anxiety and stress that it should.  A very important lesson I have learned in the past few days is that not only does my bad bingeing behavior disrupt my well-being but it also negatively affects those around me who care about me the most-my family, friends, boyfriend and even my employment.  In an attempt for me to regain control of my eating, and ultimately of my life, I have decided to start a new journal.

Yesterday I bought and read the Dr. Phil book cover to cover. A lot of his messages hit home and made sense to me.  I also bought Tony Little's new book: One on one with Tony Little, 28 day program. I bought this book because it is geared towards getting someone who is inconsistent (or unmotivated) to stick to a diet and exercise plan for 28 days. That is roughly the amount of time it takes to form a habit. This is why I feel it would get me off to a great start. For the next 28 days I am going to go "by the book" in an attempt to form some normal eating habits and to get me started on the right path. This isn't going to be a perfect diet and exercise program - I will be eating occassional protein bars and ww breads...I just am not going to stick with a very limited list of foods since that has always been a trigger for me to go off my diet and binge. 

I will post my stats on Day 1 and on the last day to compare my results.  Please remember I am doing this to break free of binge eating. Hopefully after 4 weeks I will be in a better place and can tighten up my diet some & go back to a more substantial weight training split in order to get even better results.


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## jstar (Mar 10, 2004)

*Day 1 Stats*

Chest: 34.25
Arms: 11
Waist: 28
Abdomen: 32.5
Hips: 39
Thighs: 22.5
Calves: 13.75
Size: 10
Weight: 142.5
Tanita: 30%


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## greekblondechic (Mar 10, 2004)

congratulations on your fresh start girl! I will def have to read dr phil and also look into that tony little book (let me know if its any good) what u r describing about yourself is just like me but i know we can both overcome this!!! 

BTW tony little is a funny looking and sounding guy..he overacts too much


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## jstar (Mar 11, 2004)

*Off To a Good Start....*

DAY ONE:
I woke up this morning and took a green tea capsule. I got on the elliptical for 12 minutes (as the book said). I felt really energetic in the morning after doing the elliptical. I haven't done cardio first thing in the morning in a long while. It was nice to get my day off to a good start and feel good from such a short workout.

Meals:
Breakfast: 1 piece whole wheat toast with Smart Squeeze (fat free butter substitute); carton eggwhites

Lunch: Turkey on 2 slices whole wheat bread; small apple

Snack: Fat Free Strawberry Yogurt

Gym: I was in & out! With this program we start out slow and gradually increase the duration and intensity as we go along. This week concentrates on building the "core" muscles.

15 Crunches
15 Reverse Crunches
Cable Squats: 15x60 15x80
Ab Machine: 12x10
15 Hyperextensions

Dinner: 85% lean hamburger patty with steak sauce; baked potato and mustard greens

Snack: Atkins Breakfast Bar


__________________
"I am 100% in control of my choices. I choose to succeed."


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## atherjen (Mar 11, 2004)

Hey Star! I love the new attitude and view that you have on things. You are a very strong woman and I know that you will be able to take control of things. Best of luck girlie!


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## Stacey (Mar 11, 2004)

I think  you are doing a GREAT Thing. And I totally understand where you are coming from. I can't diet a full week either without bingeing -- & It makes me upset. 

I can't wait to follow you--and I would really like to do it with you, I may go buy that book!!!!! 

You can do it honey, You have my support!!!


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## jstar (Mar 11, 2004)

> _*Originally posted by greekblondechic *_
> congratulations on your fresh start girl! I will def have to read dr phil and also look into that tony little book (let me know if its any good) what u r describing about yourself is just like me but i know we can both overcome this!!!
> 
> BTW tony little is a funny looking and sounding guy..he overacts too much



Thanks Girl..that means a lot  

The Dr Phil book is on sale at the Vitamin Shoppe for $13.00  He talks a lot about emotional overeating in it & I found it pretty informative.

Tony Little...yeah he is a funny guy, huh?  He is an ex-bodybuilder, (5th runner up in Mr America in the 80's) so he knows his stuff. I really liked the layout of the book - very straightforward and simple. He takes you day by day what to do and what to eat.  His personality really comes across in the book as well. Let me know if you are interested I can PM you with more info and maybe you can follow along with me. :smile:


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## jstar (Mar 11, 2004)

Aww thank you Jen & Stacey. I love you guys 
I'm sorry I haven't been around for a few days on IM, I had to sort all this out myself.

Stacey,  This is really a back to basics type book. I would highly recommend it to a total newbie but for someone more experienced like yourself I would say flip through it and see if it something you would be interested in before you buy it. You see my problem is that I have such an "all-or-nothing" attitude. Either I am on a rigid precontest type diet or I am bingeing on bread and cookies I really liked the format of the book and thought it would help me see that I don't have to be a perfect eater all the time, just eat more sensibly and not obsess about food. I swear I obsess so much that I can't even enjoy myself anymore. I have 2 bridal showers coming up and all I can think about is "what am I going to eat?" I need to get a grip.

Let me know if you buy the book or want any more info about it. I will be more than happy to answer your questions.


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## Jill (Mar 11, 2004)

I just started this book last night. Its really good so far. You should check it out, I think you would relate.

http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/t...102-8817917-2224918?v=glance&s=books&n=507846

I hope this works!


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## Jill (Mar 11, 2004)

Oh and same to you Greeky, check out this book.


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## greekblondechic (Mar 11, 2004)

Thanks hon will do


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## jstar (Mar 11, 2004)

I read that a couple years ago. I remember cuz of the pictures of food on the cover Thanks anyways hun! Reading these types of things does help, doesn't it?


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## Jill (Mar 11, 2004)

they do help if you can make a connection with the author.


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## Stacey (Mar 11, 2004)

My gosh-- I feel just like you JSTAR, Greekie & Jill--its like what you wrote-is how I am. I am totally addicted to sweets, chocolate, cookies, and more junk...it's bad..but them I' OBSESSED with my meals AND my body!! I'm beyond obsessed with my body that it keeps me from going places, seeing people, etc... I never want to go to a party or hang out with friends b/c of the way I look (Or the Way I "FEEL" I look) Crazy crazy!!!!!

I am definatly going to the book store this weekend to flip through these, better yet--I will go to Vitamin shoppe--you can RENT a book


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## Stacey (Mar 11, 2004)

Oh and sooo many people are worried about me for when I get pregnant, they always tell me that I better eat right, and eat enough calories. 

If they only knew I stuffed my face when I'm alone. (which is a bunch)


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## greekblondechic (Mar 11, 2004)

I know stacey, its like..u think I dont eat enough? u should see me binge... 

But really, we all need to find that BALANCE 
that is the key....


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## Jill (Mar 11, 2004)

I can totally relate to you too Stacey. The beginning of my new book Ive already made 'a' connection. A food addiction is kinda like an alcohol addiction-the only thing is you CANT live without food, so that makes it hard, the addiction


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## Stacey (Mar 11, 2004)

I know!!!! I want that BALANCE!!!!!!!!

I want to check out that book Jill--feel free to give us tips from it if you can!!!


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## Stacey (Mar 11, 2004)

** I just went to Kroger for bodywash-- & I walked past the candy binds and took out 2 yogurt covered pretzels!! I'm so bad


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## Jill (Mar 11, 2004)

I sneak a choc usually from the candy bins too Stacey, you are not alone! Its better than buying a bag!


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## Stacey (Mar 11, 2004)

hehehe YOU DO TOOO!!! I feel soooo bad!!! Would we get in trouble?? 

Yep Your right, better than having a bag full of it!!!!


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## Paynne (Mar 11, 2004)

I'm no expert on diet by far.  But for this go around I decided to just stay with a liveable diet rather than something super strict.  So far it's going great.  I'm sure you'll do awesome with this Jstar!


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## jstar (Mar 11, 2004)

Stacey & Jill You guys are naughty! 
I totally do feel like an "addict" sometimes. I still live with my parents so there is no way on earth I can have just healthy food in the house. So Dr Phils Key#3 about having a "no fail environment" is impossible for me. I find it easier though to always eat right anywhere outside of the house but when I am here, that is when it gets tough! Stacey - my friends say the same thing to me too and my coworkers...my boyfriend and I hardly go out to eat anymore either. Greek is right we should be able to find some sort of balance. That is exactly what I am trying to do!

I will post up each day what the book says so if anyone wants to follow along they can 

Hi PaynneIt's all about balance! And moderation.


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## Stacey (Mar 11, 2004)

I dooo want to follow a long!! I know honey, my hubby & I never go out to eat anymore either!! (maybe once/twice a month)

I totally understand where your coming from!!

We can make it through this!


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## Jill (Mar 11, 2004)

The new addictive eating book is already better than Dr phils IMO. Get it AGAIN from a library, for me sweets, im sure it'll help.


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## jstar (Mar 11, 2004)

Thanks Jill, I will see if I can get it at the library this weekend.


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## jstar (Mar 11, 2004)

*DAY 2* 
I did 15 minutes on the elliptical again this morning after taking a green tea cap.  Also  did another 15 minutes when I got hime from work (after taking another green tea cap). No weight training workout tonight just stretching.

Note on the meals: I am going to get some ezekiel bread this weekend instead of eating wheat. Also I am going to cut down on the baked potatoes due to the high GI. I am really confused though because in this book he gives a list of foods and their GI and some foods are high that I always thought were low. Like Oat Bran is 78 and oatmeal is 87...that can't be right, can it? Also yogurt is only a 20?
I will have to look up the official list somewhere and doublecheck 

Meals:

Breakfast: 1 ww bread, fake butter, egg whites

Lunch: 2 ww bread, 5+ oz turkey, small apple

Snack: Atkins Bar, orange

Dinner: baked potato, 2 ww bread, 5+ oz turkey, onions, ff mayo

Snack: Atkins Bar, 1.5 TBL PB

************************************
I was supposed to be off tomorrow and meet one of my competitor friends for a workout. I nw have to work so I will probably be working out alone tomorrow night. I'm going to bed, got to do 20 mins cardio tomorrow morning.


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## aggies1ut (Mar 11, 2004)

wow PB with an Atkins bar? Isn't that a lot of fat?


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## jstar (Mar 11, 2004)

wow I didn't realize..yep it's 20g all together


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## aggies1ut (Mar 11, 2004)

Aww, I'm sorry.


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## Jill (Mar 11, 2004)

Oh well-you really never ate any fat today, Its probably not a biggie!


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## Jodi (Mar 11, 2004)

Oats are only 60 on the GI.  Even though oats are a medium gi, the fiber slows down the digestion which is one of the reasons why its called a slow burning carb.  Same goes for brown rice and sweet potatos.


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## jstar (Mar 12, 2004)

Yeah my fats for the day were 30-40 anyways (I'm not counting macros for now) so no big deal.

TY Jodi - that is what I thought. Gee, I almost had a heart attack of the oats being high GI...I love my oats!


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## Jill (Mar 12, 2004)

Have a super day sunshine!!!


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## jstar (Mar 12, 2004)

aww you too Jill! Did you get my PM?


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## Stacey (Mar 12, 2004)

Hey girl how are you today???

TGIF!!!!!


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## jstar (Mar 12, 2004)

How are you Stacey?  You said it TGIF! 1 more hr til I go home, I can't wait. It's freaking snowing outside


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## Stacey (Mar 12, 2004)

SNOWING!!! OMG ARE YOU SERIOUS!! Where are you at???? Uggg Its hot here!!!!!! But I WISH it was in the 60s!! I hate having to wear shorts. I like jeans!!

I'm good thanks!!! your SO right--TGIF.

I think I'm going to the vitamin shoppe tonight to check out a book. Ya know you can rent books from them, just like a library!! NEATO!


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## jstar (Mar 12, 2004)

I'm in Taxachusetts I think it was just a flurry ( I hope).  People drive like morons in the snow and I am leaving in 30 minutes!  Wow, I wish I was wearing shorts  

I never knew that about the VS. How much is it to rent? I hope the one near me does that! I know they sell them. Let me know if you find a good read


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## Stacey (Mar 12, 2004)

HEY! You at home now??? Where is Taxachusetts??? What state?
(I'm soooo dumb...hehe)

I don't think it costs--I'm going there tonight--so I will get on here later at my moms and let you know.


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## aggies1ut (Mar 12, 2004)

Massachusetts....


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## jstar (Mar 12, 2004)

Your no dummy silly!!! Hehe I live in Massachusetts. That is what we call it here. And the drivers here are known as Mass-holes 

That is so cool if you can rent books there. The is a VS right up the street from me. That would be cool if you could rent fitness magazines too. I WISH!!!

Mmmmm it took me 1.5 hrs to get home today! I was STARVINGGGG and had nothing in my car so when I got home I had a HUGE bowl of Fiber One with lotsa blueberries and a cup of eggwhites

I have one more meal left for today. I think I will get a salad with chicken from Stop and Shop.


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## jstar (Mar 13, 2004)

*DAY 3* 

20 min elliptical before food

Breakfast: 2 ww bread, egg whites

Lunch: lean hamburger patty, 2 ww bread, small apple

Snack: Atkins Bar (160 cals)

It took me 1.5 hours to get home from work today! I was so HUNGRY and had no food in my car and was stuck in traffic. UGH.

Dinner: HUGE bowl of Fiber One with blueberries, eggwhites

Training: same as day one, but now 2 sets of each:
Crunches 2x15
Reverse Crunches 2x15
DB Squats 2x15
Hyperextensions 2x15

Last Meal: salad with 2 egg whites, 3 small pieces of grilled chicken....another Atkins Bar


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## jstar (Mar 13, 2004)

*DAY 4* 

I slept til 12 today! Funny, I had the same dream at least twice this week: that I was in Florida. Last night I dreamt I drove down with my mom and went to Miami and then to the Gulf Coast. Nevermind I have never been there before (or anywhere for that matter). No wonder I didn't want to wake up!!! It was so real too!

30 min cardio before food (elliptical)
**The book says do 15 mins twice today but I decided to do 30 at once

Meals: EDITED 

Breakfast:
Fiber One, blueberries, and egg whites
(normal portions today )

Lunch: Turkey on 2 ww bread, veggies

Snack: 1-2 oz cheddar

Dinner: Turkey on 2 ww bread, small apple

Snack: Fiber One, egg whites and little bit of protein powder on top.


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## jstar (Mar 13, 2004)

That reminds me I also dreamt I went to the Vitamin Shoppe and rented a bunch of books.


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## Katia7 (Mar 14, 2004)

Hi!
Thank you  so much for the workout plan .  It looks great!


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## jstar (Mar 14, 2004)

Your welcome.  Let me know how it goes!


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## jstar (Mar 14, 2004)

*DAY 5* 

I am starting to realize that for some reason Sundays are always the day I mess up and binge. Well I did mess up today but I am still going to keep the calories at 1600-1700 total!

My mom bought Stacy's pita chips and I thought I could "try" one.  I ended up coming back and eating 1/2 the bag!

I didn't do my cardio in the AM today
 but I wish I did. 

Meals:

M1: 2 TBL PB, 6 slices ww bread

M2: Stacy's pita chips, 1 ww bread, turkey

M3:  more pita chips

total cals so far 1300, rest of the day I am eating PROTEIN and VEGGIES!!!!

M4 turkey, peppers/zucchini/eggplant
1.5 oz cheddar

M5 choc eggies

total: 1750

Workout: 
3 sets of 15 for:
crunches
reverse crunches
hyperextensions
cable squats: 80,90,100,110 

treadmill @ 15 incline 3.0-3.6 mph. sweating buckets


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## Stacey (Mar 14, 2004)

Thats sooo crazy about your dreams girl!!!

I still haven't gone to the vitamin shoppe--and Now I have time, but they close soon. 

Hope your doing good!


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## jstar (Mar 14, 2004)

The next 2 days are active rest days. I plan to eat less carbs than the previous days throwing in a few protein/veggie only meals.


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## jstar (Mar 14, 2004)

Hey Stacey 
I know, my dreams must be telling me something. I had another weird one last night where I was in Redondo at Nationals. First FL, now CA...I must be suffering from summer-withdrawals. Grrr and it's suppose to snow again this week.


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## Stacey (Mar 14, 2004)

WoW Girl thats nuts!!!  Yep, you need some sunshine!!!


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## Jill (Mar 14, 2004)

Dont worry about the binges-I ate a tonne of chocolate this weekend-along with some popcorn and trail mix. I suck. Oh well. Im deff getting back on track tomorrow-today is already a write off.


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## aggies1ut (Mar 14, 2004)

Is this book saying to eat a lot of bread, or do you just like it?


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## jstar (Mar 15, 2004)

It says I can have ww bread but I should probably cut down some, huh?


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## jstar (Mar 15, 2004)

*DAY 6* 

My car is in the shop right now because I had a recall on it. Apparently they need to do a couple things to it to prevent my car from stalling out while in drive I hope I get my car back soon because I have an interview at 2 today I feel good about this place. I will let ya'll know how it goes 

Today is an active rest day. I'm just going to run some errands and study for the ACE test.

Meals:

M1 - Fiber One, egg whites, blueberries, 2 slices ww sf bread

*I am now going to make an effort to eat less bread-this will be tough cuz I love it*...EDIT <-----starting tomorrow!

M2 - turkey on 2 ww, apple

M3 - oats, protein powder then *gasp* 15 slices of sugar free ww bread.

cals at about 1900...I really want them to average out to about 1600.

Changes:
1-Tomorrow I am doing no carbs 
2-NO MORE BREAD AT ALL!!!
3-I am going to actually count calories and macros instead of guesstimating. The goal is 40/40/20 or 50/30/20. 
4-If I screw this up I will do one no carb day a week from this point on.

I just went food shopping and bought some more stuff and I skipped the bread isle geesh I am a carboholic. I need to go to CA


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## Stacey (Mar 15, 2004)

Hey girlie~! Good Luck on your job interview!!!!! Hope you get your car back soon! When are you taking the ACE test?? Study Hard!! My sister took it 2 weeks ago, for the second time--she said it was Very Hard. But she passed it!!! (and she is an A PLUS student--the kind who doesn't study for anything--but she studied her bootie off for it. Just a warning I may take it this summer!!!)

Have a good day & Good LUCK!!


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## jstar (Mar 15, 2004)

Hiya Stace! 

Wow I didn't think it was gonna be THAT hard. I know it's 150 mult. choice and some questions can be hard but I dunno now. I am scared. 

I am taking it May 1st but I haven't signed up yet so maybe I can take it later. It is just that I borrowed the books from a friend and I have had them since last fall! I am such a procrastinator!!!!

Got my car back and I am heading off to my interview. 

Have a great day Stacey


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## JLB001 (Mar 15, 2004)

Good Luck J with the interview!


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## atherjen (Mar 15, 2004)

Hi Star!! good luck on that interview girl!!  
what is ACE???


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## Stacey (Mar 15, 2004)

hey girl!!! Good luck today!

I think you will be JUST FINE With the test!!! My sister didn't study for the first one because she thought she was a smartiepants, then she realized it was a test she should study for. I am sure you will be just fine!

I'm a BAD Procrastinator!!!!


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## jstar (Mar 15, 2004)

Did she study at all? I have the book and workbook I borrowed from a friend...I also ordered the sample test and it didn't seem too hard. (Maybe they are trying to  trick us though!)   I think I will okay as long as I study. If I end up taking the exam before you I will let you know how tough it really is.


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## jstar (Mar 15, 2004)

Thanks girls!!!!

ACE = American Council on Exercise. It's for the personal trainer exam.

Oooooh - I can't believe I forgot to tell you all:

I GOT THE JOB!!!!!!!! :bounce: :bounce:     

I am in complete SHOCK!!!

I will be working as an analyst for this woman who owns her own compensation consulting firm. She works out of her home office and I will be working out of there with her. I actually got a decent salary and she seems really nice. She has the cutest little kitty cat and he loves to come in the office and play. hehe... I am so excited I can hardly believe this happened so fast...


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## atherjen (Mar 15, 2004)

:bounce: clap: WAY TO GO STAR!!! thats awesome!! Congrads!!!


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## jstar (Mar 15, 2004)

Thanks Jen!!!! I have been waiting forever for someone to hire me and now I have a cool new job. YAYYYY!!!!


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## Jill (Mar 15, 2004)

New job, cool!!!!!!! Way to go star!


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## jstar (Mar 16, 2004)

Damn it's starting to snow. I am leaving work NOW before it gets ugly out there!

I just wanted to post and say that I am tweaking my diet up a bit and will post when I get home. Talk to you all soon


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## atherjen (Mar 16, 2004)

Im off in 45 minutes.. it starting to storm here too!!!  
Have a great evening girlie!


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## jstar (Mar 16, 2004)

It took me 1.5 hrs to get home today, ugh. I am so sick and tired of winter and snow and it is driving me absolutely crazy! I need some sunshine dammit! Grrr if only the bf would move to Florida with me! He won't go. I mean shoot I could buy a brand new house in Florida for 1/8 of the price of an one here. I hate this place. I hate the weather. I hate the cost of living up here. Everything about this place sux. I am such a summer person - love the beach and wearing shorts and flip flops and driving with the windows down. I have never been skiing, snowboarding, ice skating or done anything wintery and I have no desire to. I feel like I live my life waiting for the spring and summer to arrive.  I also think psychologically all this bad weather affects my mood and depression and binging....in the warm weather I feel like I want to work out and be fit and watch my diet really close. In the winter I feel like I am hibernating and eating like a freaking bear. My motivation is nil. I do know I want to compete and want to be fit but it has been so hard to actually follow through with things in the winter.

As for my diet and training I am rethinking things. I have been doing some more reading and feel that I just need to listen to my body and eat a more balanced diet. My thinking is about 40/40/20 roughly.  As far as training goes the Tony Little program is really geared for beginners. All his workouts are total body and reps are 12-15. I think I will go back to a 4 day a week routine. I choose 4 days because over time I have come to figure out that my body works the best on this routine and that 3 days is too little; 5 is too much.  As for cardio I am going to start out moderately and increase as needed in order to drop 1-2 lbs fat per week.   

The biggest challenge for me is diet and motivation. I think reading some good self help books on topics such as self concept, body image, binging, self esteem and such will help me a great deal. 

Alrighty nighty nite, time for bed


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## jstar (Mar 17, 2004)

3/17/04

Meals:

M1 - 1 scoop protein, 1 cup All Bran, egg whites

M2 - apple, 2 scoops protein
(couldn't finish this meal)

M3 - 5 oz turkey, 2 slices ff cheese, pickles, salad

M4- 5 oz sweet potato, 4 oz turkey, 1 cup broccoli, 2 ff cheese



********************************
Chest/Biceps:

DB Bench Press 12x15  12x20  8x25  8x25  8x25
Incline DB Bench Press 7x25  6x25  12x20  12x20
Incline DB Flyes  12x15  10x20  10x20  10x20
Incline DB Curls:  12x10  12x12  8x15  7x15
Standing Alt DB Hammer Curls:12x5  12x10  9x12(form)

Cardio: 60 minutes on elliptical  772cal  5.51 miles


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## naturaltan (Mar 18, 2004)

morning Miss Star. 

I'm with you on the winter thing.  I've tried skiing a couple of times.  I just can't understand how freezing going up the chair lift and then freezing coming down can be considered fun.


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## Stacey (Mar 18, 2004)

Morning Sweetie!!!!
I need to go find some of those self help books-- I really want to get healed before I become pregnant, ya know?

CONGRATULATIONS ON THE NEW JOB!!! IT SOUNDS SO AWESOME!!!!! YEAH!!!  
When do you start??? COOOOOL


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## jstar (Mar 18, 2004)

Hey NT 
Thanks for stopping by! Yeah - I don't know how falling on your butt in the snow going down a hill at 70mph is supposed to be fun either  How are you?

Stacey - hey hun!!! I picked up 3 books at the library yesterday - Self Matters by Dr Phil, Unlimited Power by Tony Robbins and another one calling Losing Control (or something like that). I started to read Losing Control and it is basically about how we as a society fail at self-regulation (ie we eat too much, rely on caffeine/drugs too much, etc. everything is done to excess and we can't seem to stop ourselves. It is kinda technical but sort of interesting. I read Tony Robbins Awaken the Giant Within and that book is really good so I am hoping his other book is good too. I will let you know!


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## jstar (Mar 18, 2004)

3/18/04:

M1 - 1 cup All Bran, 2 cartons eggwhites, 1/3 cup blueberries

M2 - apple, 4 oz turkey

M3 - 4 oz turkey, 2 ff cheese

M4-2 turkey breast cutlets, 5 oz sweet potato, broccoli, 2 slices ff cheese

M5- 5 oz sweet potato, broccoli, 1 turkey breast cutlet

M6-soy pita, bagel

Workout is going to be back/abs and cardio. Yay I am leaving work in 15 mins - hopefully traffic won't be too bad. It has been AWFUL this week. People don't know how to drive in the snow
 I might have to get some more turkey but then again I do have some turkey breast cutlets in the fridge defrosting. I'm getting my Ultra Size tomorrow. I haven't had it in a long time becaause I was going thru an "experimental" phase with other protein powders. Still can't find anything that beats the taste of US - it is the best IMO.


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## Stacey (Mar 18, 2004)

Hey JStar!! Thanks girl for the info!! I'm going to target at lunch and I will see what kind of books are there...otherwise I will go to the library this weekend. Still need to check out Vitamin Shoppe...but on the internet they didn't have any selfhelp books

Your on the right path to success girL!!!!!


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## BabsieGirl (Mar 18, 2004)

Hey J!!!

First CONGRATS with the new job!!!!!!!!!!!  YAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY

Second, I didn't know you were studying to be a pt!  That's great!!!  I was thinking about the same thing.  Self employment is great....Don't get me wrong, there are downfalls to it also...Mostly positive though

Keep us posted hon!!!


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## jstar (Mar 18, 2004)

Thank Q Stacey 
I luuuvvv Target! If I went there on my lunch break I would never make it back in an hour  I will let you know if these books are any good. My library stinks with the selection but the only types of books I like to read are nonfiction - self help and nutrition/exercise books. 

Babs!!! Thanks Hun! I am very excited about the new job. I think I am starting the 29th pending my background check (shoot I hope they don't look in my trunk for the bodies  ---seriously that was a JOKE!!!!

Yeah I used to be a Nautilus Instructor at the YMCA about 5 yrs ago. It was so much fun - and I met my hunny there too (he also trained).  I always wanted to do some PT on the side and now that I am starting a new job I will have to see if I have time to do this on the side. Also, I want to get certified because --thinking ahead now---in the next year or so I hope to create my own website like so many of the girls in FAP have done. I would like to promote myself for fitness modeling and possibly also train others online. Even if I don't personally train right away I would like to have the cert. just incase an opportunity arises.


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## atherjen (Mar 18, 2004)

diet is looking great Stary Star! 
are you getting a pile of snow lately too?? I dont think I will ever see green grass again!


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## jstar (Mar 18, 2004)

Hey monkey girl  - I love that monkey we are gonna have to name him!

I must have ESP - I just posted in your journal too....yep we are getting something like a foot tonight or tomorrow night. ...then that better be it til next year!!!

How are ya?


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## atherjen (Mar 18, 2004)

what do you want to call Mr Monkey Man... (Premier HATES HIM! )  

we got a foot yestarday and then a bit more today! Im dying in snow here!!  

Im good. worked all week. off toamrrow though! halleulah! got a bunch to do!


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## jstar (Mar 19, 2004)

Maybe we should get a poll going?  Awwww he is such a cute little monkey...how can anyone not like him.

Eek- another foot? Yikes...and spring starts tomorrow (yeah right!) I am off today too, enjoy your day off hun. Do you have any plans?


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## jstar (Mar 19, 2004)

3/19/04

M1 - 1.5 cups All Bran, 1 carton All Whites, 1/3 cup blueberries

M2 - salad, 3 pieces grilled chix; 4 plain rice cakes

M3 - 2 turkey breast cutlets; 2 ff cheese

cardio - elliptical at home 60 min

M4 - 1.5 scoops Ultra Size  .5 cups oats

M5 - 2 scoops US, carton eggwhites

**looks like I am only gonna get in 5 meals today! I had a big gap between meals 1 & 2 because I had to drive my boyfriend around unexpectedly.


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## jstar (Mar 19, 2004)

BTW - I planned out a diet to follow. Basically it is 1800 cals on average and a 40/40/20 split. Yesterday I had more carbs (240g) because the day before I only ate 4 meals and 1000 cals with low carbs. 

Here is the diet I am following with substitutions listed.

M1 -1 cup All Bran, 1 carton eggwhites, 1/3 cup blueberries, 1 scoop protein

M2 - small apple (or low GI fruit); 2 scoops protein

M3 - 5 oz turkey/chicken, 2 slices ff cheese, salad, ff dressing (optional)

M4 - 5 oz sweet potato (or 1/2 cup oats),  1 cup broccoli (or green veggie), 2 ff cheese, 4 oz turkey/chicken

M5-4 oz turkey/chicken, 1 cup veggies

M6-2 scoops protein, 1 carton eggwhites

**I'm going back to Ultra Size for my protein powder because I can't find any other protein I like the taste of. My order should be coming in today. I tried the PVL in M1 with my cereal and  it just didn't work.


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## aggies1ut (Mar 19, 2004)

I've never had the Ultra Size, but the Beverly International Muscle Provider is yummy.


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## jstar (Mar 19, 2004)

I didn't like MP for some reason but I love vanilla Ultra Size I think maybe because it is sweeter


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## naturaltan (Mar 19, 2004)

> _*Originally posted by jstar *_
> Hey NT
> Thanks for stopping by! Yeah - I don't know how falling on your butt in the snow going down a hill at 70mph is supposed to be fun either  How are you?



I am ok ... and when this week's pager rotation is over, I'll be much better.   How are thing with you this morning?

There is nothing fun about that at all ...


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## Stacey (Mar 19, 2004)

Hey Girlie!! I think your goals with the fitness website, & getting your cert are wonderful!!! You will do great with that.

I know, its hard to leave target & go back to work..but I don't have too much spending money anyway. Sometimes I just go and walk around the store at lunch, smell that SHOPPING AIR, and read a magazine and go back to work..hehe. I'm a dork. I do that a LOT!

Your meals look GREAT!!!! What kind of PVL Did you try?


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## Jill (Mar 19, 2004)

Shopping is my weakness. But I still luv it!


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## jstar (Mar 19, 2004)

Hey NT!

I am doing good this morning - been busy doing errands and my boyfriend needed me to chaffeur him around while his car was being worked on. 

Pager?? What do you do for work? Are you on call?

Hey Stacey & Jill 

Stacey - it was PVL Chocolate PB. The taste is okay but the consistency is better as a shake in the blender whereas w/Ultra Size I can eat it like a pudding with very little water. I have even eaten it with no water 

Jill -I am a shopaholic too! Do you guys have Target in Canada?


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## Stacey (Mar 19, 2004)

thats cooool you can eat that Ultra powder Like PUDDING!!!


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## jstar (Mar 19, 2004)

IT's sooo yummy Stacey!

Uh Oh my mom is baking brownies


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## Stacey (Mar 19, 2004)

OH YUMMMY I would fall apart since its the weekend with the brownies

Ummm Go to target or something..hehehehe...


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## naturaltan (Mar 19, 2004)

Dear Star ... sadly I'm in the computer industry and yes, I am on call.  It sucks!  There is no amount of money worth having people wake you up out of a nice peaceful sleep to answer silly questions.


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## atherjen (Mar 19, 2004)

> _*Originally posted by jstar *_
> BTW - I planned out a diet to follow. Basically it is 1800 cals on average and a 40/40/20 split. Yesterday I had more carbs (240g) because the day before I only ate 4 meals and 1000 cals with low carbs.
> 
> Here is the diet I am following with substitutions listed.
> ...



this looks WELL planned!!   
good luck with it hun!


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## jstar (Mar 19, 2004)

My dad ate most of the brownies and I am going out now so by the time I get back the rest will probably be gone!!! I would go to Target but it's a hike to get there for me!

NT - I have MUCH respect for you then - I used to work for a computer company that ran a bunch of call centers with techies who answered all kinds of questions and took call after call. Unfortunately the co. I used to work for treated these ees really badly and they worked so hard! I hated that about my former company.

Jen - TY - It takes the guesswork out of things plus I like what I am eating, it's balance and clean - it should do the trick


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## Jill (Mar 19, 2004)

Tell me about the protein powder that tastes like puddin darling!


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## greekblondechic (Mar 19, 2004)

i taste like pudding 

jk.. i didnt know what else to say


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## jstar (Mar 20, 2004)

@ Greeky...welcome back. How was Miami?

Jill - It's Ultra Size by Beverly International. I order it from www.vitaglo.com. I think the vanilla tastes like cake mix . It's awesome in protein pancakes and to me it's like a treat.


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## jstar (Mar 20, 2004)

Sorry - I couldn't edit this so it's a repost!

3/19/04

M1 - 1.5 cups All Bran, 1 carton All Whites, 1/3 cup blueberries

M2 - salad, 3 pieces grilled chix; 4 plain rice cakes

M3 - 2 turkey breast cutlets; 2 ff cheese

cardio - elliptical at home 60 min

M4 - 1.5 scoops Ultra Size .5 cups oats

M5 - 2 scoops US, carton eggwhites

M6 - *1 cup All Bran, 3 rice cakes         I was wrong. I was up late and got in another meal.* 

**looks like I am only gonna get in 5 meals today! I had a big gap between meals 1 & 2 because I had to drive my boyfriend around unexpectedly.

Last edited by jstar on 03-19-2004 at 12:59 PM


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## Jill (Mar 20, 2004)

What kind of rice cakes do you like jstar?


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## jstar (Mar 20, 2004)

Jill - I normally get plain unsalted (yeah I know boring) rice cakes---this time I bought white cheddar--the only thing bad is the sodium (80 mg per rice cake). I always read the label and get ones that are sugar free!!!


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## JLB001 (Mar 20, 2004)

<perk>  Brownies?????  mmmmm, with walnuts and choc chips????


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## Jill (Mar 20, 2004)

> _*Originally posted by jstar *_
> Jill - I normally get plain unsalted (yeah I know boring) rice cakes---this time I bought white cheddar--the only thing bad is the sodium (80 mg per rice cake). I always read the label and get ones that are sugar free!!!


Arent all rice cakes sf???? I used to always eat the crispy minis in cheddar cheese flavor, they WERE my fav. I quit buying them 6 or so months ago, after I read an article that eating rice cakes is like eating a bowl full of sugar-how it affects your blood sugar / insulin.


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## Paynne (Mar 20, 2004)

One GI list I checked said rice cakes are GI 81.  Which for me means PWO only!


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## jstar (Mar 20, 2004)

> _*Originally posted by JLB001 *_
> <perk>  Brownies?????  mmmmm, with walnuts and choc chips????




 She put choc chips in them!!! But I was a good girl


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## greekblondechic (Mar 20, 2004)

Mmmm brownies!

Miami was beautiful, I love sun and palm trees!


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## jstar (Mar 20, 2004)

> _*Originally posted by Jill *_
> Arent all rice cakes sf???? I used to always eat the crispy minis in cheddar cheese flavor, they WERE my fav. I quit buying them 6 or so months ago, after I read an article that eating rice cakes is like eating a bowl full of sugar-how it affects your blood sugar / insulin.



You will have to check the label but NO they are not all sugarfree esp the flavored ones.


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## jstar (Mar 20, 2004)

> _*Originally posted by Paynne *_
> One GI list I checked said rice cakes are GI 81.  Which for me means PWO only!



Really?? I never knew that! I was just trying to find a GI list on the net but had no luck (only short lists) I also know that insulin idex is more important than the GI but I don't know what that is for rice cakes. What site were you on?

I know that last year the person who helped me out with my precontest diet said I could have plain unsalted rice cakes or the multigrain one with PB as a snack~
I will try to limit them but I am not going to eliminate them just yet 

Thanks for the info Paynne!


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## Jodi (Mar 20, 2004)

http://www.mendosa.com/index.html


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## jstar (Mar 21, 2004)

Thanks Jodi! 

I was on that site but didn't think to try a search--

"rice cakes in moderation"


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## jstar (Mar 21, 2004)

*Workouts*

I haven't posted my workouts this week so here they are:

3/17
Chest/Biceps

DB Bench Press: 12x15  12x20  8x25  8x25  8x25
DB Incline Press: 7x25  6x25  12x20  10x20
DB Incline Flyes:  12x15  10x20  10x20  10x20
Seated DB Incline Bicep Curls: 12x10  12x12  8x15  7x15
Standing Alt. DB Hammer Curls:  12x5  12x10  9x12*(form)
cardio: 60 elliptical   

3/18
Back/Abs

Wide Grip Pulldowns:  12x40  12x50  5x60*sloppy  9x50  8x50
HS Rows: 12x40  6x80  9x70  9x70
1-Arm DB Rows:  12x25  7x30  6x30  10x25
Hyperextensions: 3x12
Crunches: 3x12
Reverse Crunches: 3x12
cardio: 15 treadmill incline, 45 elliptical

3/19
OFF
cardio: 60 elliptical

3/20
Shoulders/Triceps

HS Shoulder Press: 12x40  12x50  10x70  8x70
Upright Row: 8x40  8x40  8x40  8x40
Seated DB Laterals: 12x5  8x8  8x8  12x5
Standing DB Rear Delt Flyes: 12x5  10x8  8x8  12x8
Tricep Cable PD:  12x50  12x60  12x70  6x80
Nosebreakers: 12x18  12x18  12x18
cardio: 60 elliptical 

Workouts have been GREAT this week! I feel so pumped all the time--must be from all the carbs I am eating.  My chest was really sore for a couple days after doing my chest workout. On back day I was a little disappointed that I couldn't lift as much on the HS Row as I did before but again I was a bit sore so maybe I should alternate week to week:

This week:
Wed = Chest/Biceps
Thur  = Back/Abs

Next week:
Wed = Back/Abs
Thurs = Chest/Biceps

The shoulder workout was good too. I can lift way more on the HS Press than the old machine. Great for my ego


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## jstar (Mar 21, 2004)

3/20

M1: 1 cup All Bran, 1 carton ew, 1 scoop protein, 6 strawberries
330  40C  35P  4F 

M2: 2 scoops protein, 1/4 cup blueberries
270  17C  34P  8F 

M3: 5 oz sweet potato, 4 oz turkey, 1 cup broccoli, 2 ff cheese
355  38C  46P  3F 

PWO:M4: 1 cup oats, 1/2 carton ew, 1 scoop protein, 1 rice cake
490  68C 35P  10F 

M5: 4 oz turkey, 1/2 red pepper 
150  6C  31P  1F 

M6: 2 scoops protein, 1 ew cart. 
300  10C  49P  8F 

*hungry* all day! Made a boo-boo at night before bed:
M7-2 ww bread, 2 white bread, 2 rolls
560  102C  18P  8F
 


2455  280C  247P  42F


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## jstar (Mar 21, 2004)

Here are my macros since I started this journal: 

3/17
1166  116C  174P  6.5F

3/18
1795  240C  216P  5F

3/19
1680  245.5C  163.5P  25F

3/20
2455  280C  247P  42F

I didn't mean to go ultra low fat the first 2 days--it just happened(?)


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## Jill (Mar 21, 2004)

Cool, looks good. You protein only has 16 grams per scoop? That seems low-or they must be small scoops! Oh 60 min of cardio at once, beeeeeee careful, thats quite a bit at a time! But who am I to talk, Ive been doing 40-45 mins 4-5X a week!


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## jstar (Mar 21, 2004)

The protein powder has 17g per scoop. I am still getting in 150-200g protein a day so it's ok....yeah I am taking today as a rest day (I was going to do legs but I will do em tomorrow instead!). I really don't see anything wrong with more frequent cardio for short periods of time. I was planning to do a lot more cardio for the next few weeks until I go to that show and see my girls compete. I have some jeans I am dying to wear but my big ole  can't get in em right now!


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## Jill (Mar 21, 2004)

> _*Originally posted by jstar *_
> I have some jeans I am dying to wear but my big ole  can't get in em right now!


I can relate!


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## jstar (Mar 22, 2004)

3/21

Rest day. 

I was sooooo tired  all day. I felt like a complete zombie. My diet was way off, I had too many carbs and not the good kind either.  Mostly it was bread though instead of cookies, chocolate and ice cream. Well, ok I did have a Carb Sense ice cream bar and it was good. I don't feel guitly or bad about myself today I feel refreshed actually and I am going to just pick up right where I left off. This is a process and I don't have to be perfect.  I just have to never give up. I weighed and measured today and I am down 3 lbs (probably water) and my calves grew .25 inches yay!!! My other measurements were slightly less.

Yesterday I went to an open house for this condo up the street from me. I liked the set-up of the condo; the only thing wrong was that it was too close to the main street and therefore too noisy.  If it had been in the next building over I would have considered it but it would probably still be noisy - especially in the summer time with the windows open!


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## naturaltan (Mar 22, 2004)

morning Miss Star.


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## Jill (Mar 22, 2004)

I bought sf fudgsicles!!! They only have like 49 cals, 12 carbs, no fat or sugar-sweetned with aspertame! They are so rich and yummy!


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## jstar (Mar 22, 2004)

Hi NT Did you have a nice weekend?

Hi Jill What brand were those? No sugar? That sounds pretty good.
I just checked the one I had. I made a mistake on the name: they are made by Carb Smart; not Carb Sense. Here is the breakdown:

Calories:100
Carbs: 9
Protein: 2
Fat: 7
sugar: 3
sugar alcohol: 5

not that great, eh?


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## JLB001 (Mar 22, 2004)

Oh those are yummy!


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## jstar (Mar 22, 2004)

Today I got the fabric swatches from bodytecfitness in the mail.  :bounce:

She sent a bunch in all different colors.  Some were neons (I guess for bodybuilders), velvets, wet look and regular but there were a few others I liked.


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## jstar (Mar 22, 2004)

3/22

M1: 1 cup All Bran, 1 scoop Ultra Size, 1 carton All Whites
270  25C  29P  4F    

PWO
M2: 2 scoops Ultra Size, 1 scrambler
300  10C  49P  8F    



Workout: Legs/Calves/Cardio
DB Lunges 15x12  15x12  15x12  15x12
Lying Leg Curl:15x30  12x35  12x35
Leg Extensions: 15x20  15x20  15x20
Seated Calf: 10x85  12x85  12x85

**I angled outwards on my last 2 sets of calves-never done that before but it felt more intense.

**My leg workout didn't have too much volume because my legs/butt have felt like they have worked out a lot this week. I didn't want to overkill.

Cardio:
10 treadmill  @3.3mph, 15 incline
50 elliptical


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## jstar (Mar 22, 2004)

Hi jodie


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## naturaltan (Mar 22, 2004)

My weekend was pretty quiet ...    My daughter and I bought a giant doodle art (big picture you colour with felts).  We got caught up doing that most of the weekend.  

Next weekend will be much more to my liking.  We're off to Calgary to cause havoc for Saturday, and then Sunday we're back home causing trouble (our daughter is going with her grandparents to visit relatives for her spring break).


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## jstar (Mar 22, 2004)

Nice. how old is your daughter?

 stay outta trouble in Calgary


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## naturaltan (Mar 22, 2004)

my daughter is 10 ...

stay outta trouble ...  that will be a job unto itself.


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## jstar (Mar 22, 2004)

that's a fun age, huh? 

hmmm what sorta trouble are we tallking about


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## naturaltan (Mar 22, 2004)

trouble with a capital T ...  ... when the missus says she's looking for trouble, all heck may break loose.  The last time she said that, I had to warn the bouncers that I was not responsible for anything that happened after I warned them ...  ... clothes may fly ... things may happen ... all heck may break loose.


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## Jill (Mar 22, 2004)

> _*Originally posted by jstar *_
> have to never give up. I weighed and measured today and I am down 3 lbs (probably water) and my calves grew .25 inches yay!!! My other measurements were slightly less.


Right on chickie!


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## Stacey (Mar 23, 2004)

Morning JStar! Hope you have a good day!!


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## jstar (Mar 24, 2004)

Hi Everyone!

So the past couple days I sort of have been taking a break from training. Here is my schedule for this week:

Wed: chest/biceps/cardio
Thursday: back/abs/cardio
Friday: cardio
Saturday: shoulders/triceps/cardio
Sunday: legs/calves/cardio
Monday: cardio
Tuesday: cardio

Cardio will be 20-60 minutes per session depending on how I feel. Diet will be the same as last week minus the cheats! It runs around 1800 cals with a 40/40/20 macro split.

In other news.....my vacation to Florida this summer has been confirmed!  .....I will be driving down w/my mom and brother the last week in June-first week in July.  I am not sure where we are going yet but somewhere on the gulf coast, possibly Ft Myers.  I am sooooo excited! Now that I know the dates we are going I plan to compete in the Fitness America New york show on August 14th. I also heard that a Boston show maybe in the works for the fall. If that is the case you can count on me being there too! I will keep everyone posted!

Time to crack that whip!


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## atherjen (Mar 24, 2004)

Congrads on the progress Star!!  

sounds like a FUN trip!! Ive never been to Flordia, Im sure it will be nice !
did u say a show! WAHO! Aug.14!  right on hun !


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## jstar (Mar 24, 2004)

Hi Jen!

I have never been either! I have never been anywhere so this will be so much FUN! Don't worry I will take PLENTY of pictures!

Yep Aug 14th is the date. I need to FOCUS FOCUS FOCUS


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## BabsieGirl (Mar 24, 2004)

GOOD FOR YOU STAR!!!!!!!  WAAAAhhooooooooOOOOOOO

You'll have a blast in Florida.  What all do you plan to do there?


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## jstar (Mar 24, 2004)

Hi Babs!  Good to have you back on the boards! 

My parents/family may possibly relocate their so they want to check out different neighborhoods and see where they might want to live. They probably wouldn't move for a while but they have always wanted to go and none of us has ever taken a vacation so we just decided to go for it! I am glad we are going when we are because that means I can still do the Aug comp I want to do...it all works out great 

How R you hun?


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## BabsieGirl (Mar 24, 2004)

yep,  you're gonna have fun!! Be sure to take PLENTY of pic  We'll all be jealous of ya

I'm doing okay.  Besides the darn headache and now a sore throat.  Still hanging in there......


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## JLB001 (Mar 24, 2004)

Pics!  lots of them from Florida!  You should have lots of fun there!  Craig's parents live in Florida.  I haven't been since I was in 5th grade when we lived there.


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## jstar (Mar 24, 2004)

I will take plenty of pics! I should buy a digi camera! Hmmm my b-day is coming up  I think I might treat myself


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## DrChiro (Mar 24, 2004)

well we are gonna try to go to disney over my break (or a cruise)....if we can get along till then!


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## jstar (Mar 24, 2004)

cool  who is "we"? You and Jodie? Everyone thinks I am crazy going down in the middle of summer but I LOVE the heat and hot weather, not to mention the beach! 

 cruise to disney sounds fun!


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## jstar (Mar 24, 2004)

3/24

Meals:

M1
1 cup All Bran
1/2 cup ew
1 scoop protein
1/3 cup blueberries
315  55C  33P  4F 

M2
4 oz turkey
2 ff cheese
salad greens
210  8C  40P  1F 

M3
2 scoops protein
small apple
320  29C  35P  8F

M4
5 oz chicken breast
2 slices sesame ezekiel bread
red pepper
2 slices ff cheese
mustard400  36C  53P  5F

M5 
4 oz turkey
red pepper150  4C  30P  2F

M6
2 scoops protein
1/2 cup ew
300  10C  45P 8F

1695  142C  236P  28F

Workout:Chest/Biceps

DB Presses: 12x20  10x25  9x25  9x25
Incline HS Press: 12x40  5x50+3x40  12x40
DB Incline Flyes: 12x15  9x20  9x20
DB Incline Curls: 12x15  10x15  7x15
Standing DB Hammer Curls: 12x10  12x12

**My gym was sooooo busy (I hate that...I had to wait for an incline bench which sucks because I do 3 exercises on it! I was forced to use the HS Incline which was a little ackward~
Oh yeah I decided to take the volume down a notch on my workouts just temporarily - I think 4 sets of every exercise was too much - I am going for 3 on most exercises (except shoulders - I WANT to keep the volume up there since they are a weak point).

No cardio tonight. Too freaking busy! Well I could jump on my elliptical in the basement but its already 8 and I need to get in 2 more meals....

Here's to better planning tomorrow


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## JLB001 (Mar 24, 2004)

Jstar..Craig was meaning the two of us.  We never go far without each other.  Maybe you'll be there when we are.  His parents live about 45 ins North of Orlando.

Oh...that apple you had sounds yummy!


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## Jill (Mar 24, 2004)

I just had a golden delish!


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## jstar (Mar 24, 2004)

That's what I thought Jodie When are you going? I don't think we are leaving the gulf coast....oooh you 2 will have so much fun!

It was a red delicious apple - my absolute favorite - the darker the better


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## jstar (Mar 25, 2004)

3/25

Meals

M1
1 cup Fiber One
1/2 cup ew
1/3 cup blueberries
1 scoop protein
315  55C  33P  4F 

M2
3 oz turkey
3 ff cheese
salad
2 TBL ff italian
255  15C  45P  2F 

M3
2 scoops protein
small apple
320  29C  35P  8F

M4
chicken salad:
5 oz cooked chix
ff mayo
chopped pickle, black pepper
2 slices ezekiel
360  40C  44P  5F

M5
2 scoops protein
3 TBL PB protein
1/2 cup ew
340  12C  47P  8F

M6
3 slices ezekiel bread
240  42C  12P  3F

1830  193C  216P  30F

Workout: Back/Abs
Wide Grip PD: 12x40  6x60  6x60  12x50
HS Rows: 12x60  7x80  9x70  9x70
1 Arm DB Rows: 9x30  9x30
HS Abs: 15x10  12x15  12x15
Hyperextensions: 3x12
Crunches: 3x15

elliptical: 40 minutes


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## atherjen (Mar 25, 2004)

diets looking good!  
how are you today Star?


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## Stacey (Mar 25, 2004)

awwwwwwww FLORIDA!!! Your going to have FUN!!! 

Just poppin' in... diet looks great girl!!


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## Jill (Mar 25, 2004)

Meals are looking good. What is All bran, like cereal? How do you eat that with the berries and protein and ew???


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## atherjen (Mar 25, 2004)

Jill - u havent seen Allbran?? its the original bran cereal. just like Fiber 1. I love it!


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## Jill (Mar 25, 2004)

If its the all bran Im thinking of isnt it real high in sugar???


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## aggies1ut (Mar 25, 2004)

I've even seen All Bran Clusters and All Bran with extra fiber.


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## jstar (Mar 26, 2004)

Hi Jill - 

I use the All Bran with Extra Fiber. It is very similar to Fiber One....here is the nutrition info - ooops I am all out but I will try this from memory:

per 1/2 cup
50 calories
20g carbs
2g(?) protein
0g fat
14g fiber
0g sugar

I eat M1 like cereal: in a bowl put in the All Bran, some frozen blueberries on top and instead of milk use eggwhites (All Whites). I add 1 scoop of protein on top and eat it just like that. Yeah I know I am strange


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## jstar (Mar 26, 2004)

Hi Jen Hi Stacey 
I'm doing good. I just finished up my job yesterday, now I have today and Monday off before I start my new job on Tuesday. 
aaahhh I will miss all this time off!!!!
Stacey - yep FL is going to be a blast! I have to talk to one of my friends b/c she is going down for a wedding and I think it might overlap when I am going to be there!

3/26
Today I am going to another gym to train with my FAP friends who I have not seen in 6 months....we are gonna have a blast!

Have a great day everyone


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## Stacey (Mar 26, 2004)

Hey Honey!  Good Luck with the new Job on Tuesday, are you getting excited??
Thats cool you may get to meet up with a friend.
Hey those books your reading... where did you get them? 
I am thinking of getting one of them. I can't get two, because of money.. 

Have a great day!


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## sara (Mar 26, 2004)

> _*Originally posted by jstar *_
> Hi Jill -
> 
> I use the All Bran with Extra Fiber. It is very similar to Fiber One....here is the nutrition info - ooops I am all out but I will try this from memory:
> ...



Sounds like a good idea  I'm going have to try this with the Fiber One  cereal


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## jstar (Mar 26, 2004)

> _*Originally posted by Stacey *_
> Hey Honey!  Good Luck with the new Job on Tuesday, are you getting excited??
> Thats cool you may get to meet up with a friend.
> Hey those books your reading... where did you get them?
> ...



I got them from the library! Yeah - buying them would be expensive!


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## atherjen (Mar 26, 2004)

Hiya StaryStar!  
Enjoy your time off! and with your friend that you havent seen in a while either!


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## jstar (Mar 26, 2004)

> _*Originally posted by sara *_
> Sounds like a good idea  I'm going have to try this with the Fiber One  cereal



 you will like it ! I just had this meal w/Fiber One and it's yummy 

What type of protein powder do you use Sara? It may or may not be a good idea to top of the cereal w/protein powder. I just add it for x-tra protein but you could use more eggwhites instead. LMK how you like it!


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## sara (Mar 26, 2004)

I will only make it with egg whites and some cinnamon no protein powder


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## jstar (Mar 26, 2004)

> _*Originally posted by atherjen *_
> Hiya StaryStar!
> Enjoy your time off! and with your friend that you havent seen in a while either!



Hi Jennifer

Thanks girl! I will definitely enjoy my time off and late this afternoon working out with my friends...I usually work out solo so this will be fun for a change.

 I am mad today because my car is having problems....I took it in for a recall last week and everything was fine after that but yesterday my service engine soon light came on as I was on the highway driving home from work. Last week when it came on they said it was nothing, it was b/c the cap wasn't properly put back on the gas tank after I got gas. Well...I just got back from the dealer and they said that my casket/ gasket (whatever) is leaking and needs to be replaced.  they couldn't tell me that last week? Or maybe they knew that but they wanted to me to come back so I would be forced to pay. They also made a big deal saying my belts need to be replaced....the whole thing is gonna be $400 

What makes it worse is that I am such a typical girl and know sh*t about cars so I dunno if this guy is lying or what.


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## Jill (Mar 26, 2004)

What kind of car do you have?


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## jstar (Mar 27, 2004)

I have a 2000 Nissan Sentra...bought it new and it has never given me problems before.

Oh you guys are gonna love this:

I popped open the gas tank and checked to see if the cap was on right. It appeared to be on tight but I just turned it a little anyways to make sure. Well now the "service engine soon" light is OFF!!!! 

  I am pretty sure the guy at the dealer was trying to scam me because he is a prick and I am just a "dumb girl." Grrrrrrr f-in a**hole!!! My car is NOT leaking like he said it was and I do NOT need new belts!!! My mechanic charged me $100 for a brake job the week before I brought my car to Nissan for the recall and I think they are just pissed that I didn't take it to them! I asked him about my belts and the slight grinding and its only grinding b/c the type of pads he used - it is fine!


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## jstar (Mar 27, 2004)

3/26

Meals:

M1 French Toast 
3 slices ezekiel bread
1/2 cup eggwhites
sf syrup
300  42C  27P  3F 

M2
1 cup Fiber One
1/2 cup eggwhites
1 scoop protein
1/3 cup blueberries
315  55C  33P  4F 

M3
2 slices ezekiel bread
tuna burger
pickles
270  36C  27P  2F 

M4
4 slices ezekiel bread
1 scoop protein
440  61C  33P  9F 

M5
2 scoops protein
240  10C  34P  8F 

M6
4 ezekiel bread
1 TBL PB
415  58C  20P  12F 

1980  262C  174P  38F 

Workout:
We worked out in a circuit doing legs and shoulders...I also hit some tris and then cardio:

DB Lunges: 3x12x20
DB Presses: 3x15x15
DB Rear Delts: 4x10x12
DB Laterals: 3x8x12, 1x12x10
Tri Cable PD: 3x12 
Smith Squats: 3x12x50
1 Leg Deadlifts 3x12x20 each
30 elliptical

ooohh my  is so sore today. I never tried 1 legged deadlifts before. They are soooo awesome! Finally a good exercise for firming up the booty!

I worked out with my friends yesterday. I watched them practice their fitness routines which was sooo fun! They all think I can be ready for the show in 4 weeks  which is insane but flattering. (I guess we are out own worst critics). I probably won't do it though b/c I don't have a suit and I don't have an outfit for the themed sportswear round.


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## Jill (Mar 27, 2004)

What is ezekiel bread? Looks like you like it!! I bought bran cereal yesterday, havent tried it yet...


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## atherjen (Mar 27, 2004)

someone likes their ezekiel bread!  

great workout!!! ohhhhhhh see thats what I always say, we are always toooooooo hard on ourselves! and your friends wouldnt lie to you hun! you must be looking good! we need pics!


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## aggies1ut (Mar 27, 2004)

That's a lot of bread. I tried Ezekiel bread once. I didn't like it. JMHO.


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## Jill (Mar 28, 2004)

I bought all bran-Ihad a hand full from the box, it tastes like cardboard. How else can I eat it?


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## Jodi (Mar 28, 2004)

All bran is nastly   That's why I stick with fiber one.


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## jstar (Mar 29, 2004)

fiber one is a little sweeter Jill. I must be a weirdo..I eat all bran dry too  and i can eat a 1/2 loaf of ezekiel bread at once! plain too!


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## jstar (Mar 29, 2004)

The past 2 days I have been eating like a        I have problems ...I have been reading up on the internet cuz I really don't know why I cannot control myself. I was doing fine then 2 days ago I was at my boyfriends and we went to the supermarket I had a STRONG urge to buy rice cakes or something with refined carbs but forced myself to get a salad at the salad bar instead. We went back to his apt and I ate it. I wasn't hungry after that but I felt like my brain was hooked on carbs...I couldn't stop thinking about them. Well later that night when I went home I binged and then all day yesterday, feeling guilty about the day before, I binged again. This morning I feel  like shit. Whine, whine, whine, I know. I am actually just at rock bottom now. I am sick and tired of doing this to myself and I want to change. Shit I need to change! Doing this to myself is setting me up for all kinds of diseases and problems when I get older. I don't just need to do this to drop a few lbs but to be healthy. Like I said I have been reading up on different sites and how excess sugar f's with your insides and makes you crave it more and more. It messes with your moods and it definitely is ruining my life!!!! 

Not to put the blame elsewhere but I really think if I moved out of my house I could give up eating like shit and be healthy and normal! This is the ONLY place I ever binge and eat like a fat ass coach potato. I do not go out and buy this shit food on my own. Never have and never will! I shouldn't even be eating ezekiel bread because it is too easy for me to overeat that too. I am thinking of just eliminating all refined carbs for a while and just eating all natural foods - like all fruits and vegetables, nuts, oils, lean meats. One thing I never really mentioned on this board is that I am addicted to caffeine. I  don't like coffee but I drink diet lemon pepsi by the gallon. My skin is horrible and I know why. I feel like my whole life is controlled by food and trying to lose weight but really I need to get rid of the junk - the caffeine, the sweetners, the sugar, the refined carbs. If I do this I will be healthy and have healthy skin and no doubt my moods will be more stable and less erratic. All this does make sense to me now but I feel like I am destined to fail as long as I live in a house that is filled with the very shit I am trying to give up! 

On the brighter side of things I do have a job now and will hopefully be able to get a condo this year. I am looking at a place today at 12 noon. The price is great and I am keeping my fingers crossed that this place has no major problems. Wish me luck. 

PS - sorry for the ranting. this board is like therapy to me only cheaper 
(ie - free!) I am just glad that I know what my problem is and how to fix it. Now the final step is taking action.


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## Stacey (Mar 29, 2004)

Hey Honey, I am proud of you for posting that. You are right this is Free therapy on here..which is why I post things that I would NEVER ever tell my Best Friend or my mom.. We are all here for you JStar. If you ever need to talk you can PM me or email me at aprincess68@hotmail.com

You know I'm like you also like you when I go to my moms house. For some reason I just binge like crazy. Yesterday I had too many pretzels & a handful of M&M's at her house. But I was STARVING.
I told my mom to not let me do this --eat her food.. and lately she hasn't--but she said nothing yesterday b/c She knew I was hungry

It's very hard because the food is RIGHT There..sooo damn tempting!!! 

You can fight this..and I will help you (as I am trying to help myself also. I have looked everywhere for a good book..can't find one)

Take care honey, and eat well today-- It's a new day!


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## Stacey (Mar 29, 2004)

That is awesome about the Condo!! I hope its Clean & Nice so you can get it! Good Luck!


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## atherjen (Mar 29, 2004)

Ahhh Star sweetie dont be sorry for ranting or anything. this is YOUR journal and your place to let your steam out. 
I know you can get ahold of this girie. and you know, I completly agree- I think that if your dropped the trigger foods, like processed carbs, caffiene and artificial sweetners for even just a week it will make a world of difference. my ND has made changes for me in my diet to help me feel better and its all natural foods. even whey is gone. I feel much better, although sometimes a lil sluggish since my body is detoxing from the bad things I was feeding it before and not even thinking they were bad (for me and my body). anyways hun I truly truly believe that you can overcome this, keep your head up and rather than being so focused on your body right now(which is great anyways), try and focus more on cleaner more natural eating and feeling better overall. as Stace said if you ever need to talk PM me for my email addy hun!  

on a positive note- thats awesome with the new job today and condo!!  Im jealous!! 
Have a great day girlie!!


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## Jill (Mar 29, 2004)

Hon-I can relate. I havent binged in a while, but caught myself almost about to last night then stopped it at the last minute. You need to figure out what triggers the binge. IMO, you should have just bought the stupid rice cakes and had just a few-that may have prevented the binge I dont think it is a good idea to drop carbs-that is "restriciting" which in turn can lead to binging-as you can see it is a never ending cycle.

As with Greeky, I think you need to get to the root of the problem-which is what I am in the midst of doing myself. The triggers, and most of all the feelings and emotions that go along with a binge. I  have been doing a lot of soul searching these last few weeks and have accepted that "I am not perfect". People do slip from time to time but every day is a new start. Its an all or nothing approach most binge eaters take. You need to find "balance". Omit the label of good/bad foods-everything in moderation is fine. Perfectionism is a common trait of people with eating disorders-I have been a perfect example all my life.....

As for the "no water" thing I have an idea. Steve was always on my back for drinking crystal light and diet pop. Soooooo one day a few weeks ago I was like NO MORE. I am between 4-5L of water a day and feel better than ever. A diet drink on occasion is not gonna kill ya, but being a previous "water hater", I know love the stuff! Actually, lets rephrase that, "like" the stuff!! It is my daily goal to fill my bottle 5X. Youknow how good it is for your body and skin too.

Keep your head up sunshine, and be strong. I know you can get through this. Sorry about the long post.


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## jstar (Mar 29, 2004)

Stacey, Jen, Jill...thank you all so much . Your words mean more to me than I can describe.

I just got back from seeing the condo with my mom and my boyfriend (who is going to live their w/me). I liked it, he liked it and she didn't. The only bad thing I could see wrong with it was that it is kinda a hike to the highway and it would be a long way to work so that is the only real reason I had reservations about it. The place had a lot going for it. 2 large bedrooms, new appliances (all staying) low condo fee and low price. It was quite spacious and nice. I sort of got pissy at my mom in the car on the way back because she didn't like it and was trying to talk me out of it. After thinking about it some more I realized I would probably get sick of the commute so I am still gonna keep looking. I have a family friend who is a real estate agent and I am meeting him on Saturday to talk about what I am looking for, hopefully a little closer to the highway. I have impulsive tendecies and I am very eager to move out but I don't want to get all fired up about a place and then realize it wasn't sooo great. Better to take my time and see what's out there I guess. Ridicolous as it sounds part of me really wants to just move out ASAP just so I can get my eating habits under control! But I must keep telling myself: take your time, find the right place.

Jen - I didn't even think about the whey being a semi processed food. Yeah I am all for ditching all the unnecessary, artificial crap out of my diet and turning to all natural foods. I am just kidding myself here thinking that  I can be healthy without drinking water (only when I workout) and guzzling diet soda all day. Not to mention all the sodium and artificially sweetned things I eat. This is NOT doing me any good. You have excellent eating habits, I am gonna need some help figuring out a new meal plan if you don't mind.

Jill - If I had bought those rice cakes I would have binged anyways, I know myself enough to know that once I eat a lot of high gi/processed shit that I will gorge full force after that....I know it sounded like I was saying that I am going to drop all carbs but that isn't what I meant. I meant I would still eat veggies like potatoes and corn and peas, etc. and oats, just give up the things I binge on and that trigger the bingeing. (like you said). All of this is easier said than done and no doubt I would have a better shot at fixing this problem once I do move out but I am not going to sit around and wait for that day to come either. It is great you have given up diet soda in favor of more water...how did you do it? I am ready to do this!!!!


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## greekblondechic (Mar 29, 2004)

*BIG HUGS* jstar.. i can relate to u as well, i hate how this obsession controls me and makes me cry when i look in the mirror or think about myself.  i wish there was a switch to turn binging and negative thoughts OFF

maybe we just need to create that switch


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## jstar (Mar 29, 2004)

Yeah I wish it were that easy too! 

Don't get depressed over all this Greekie. I know it is overwhelming and it REALLY makes us feel like a failures and horrible after we binge but this is something that can be OVERCOME. And I do think we need to figure out WTF is really going on with us - I am gonna PM you.


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## JLB001 (Mar 29, 2004)

I have a question...what is it that you guys determine as a binge?
I don't mean to sound stupid, just trying to understand ya'lls term of it.  Is it eatting one thing of something that is not on the planned meal for the day or the whole container/bag of the item at one time?


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## Stacey (Mar 29, 2004)

JStar! I agree take your time on finding the perfect condo~ I understand why you want out so fast though!

We ( You, Greeky & ME) Are gonna beat this crap!! I'm proud of Jill--she is On her way!!!!


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## Stacey (Mar 29, 2004)

well My Binging is having M&M's..and then some crackers, and then some pretzels, then a few more M&M's... Or jelly beans or whatever.

If I'm at my moms-- I will eat a lot of candy, (skittles), And Chips. (I only let myself go there once a week)

Theres more too..just having a brain fart right now!!!


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## JLB001 (Mar 29, 2004)

See to me that is just cheating, not really a binge.


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## jstar (Mar 29, 2004)

> _*Originally posted by JLB001 *_
> I have a question...what is it that you guys determine as a binge?
> I don't mean to sound stupid, just trying to understand ya'lls term of it.  Is it eatting one thing of something that is not on the planned meal for the day or the whole container/bag of the item at one time?



I am too embarrassed to tell ya all I ate yesterday and the day before. Not to mention I can't remember! 

A binge to me isn't just a cheat meal but an out of control feast! Much like how a bulimic stuffs themself and then  except I don't do that. It is a real bad problem because I cheat then just go crazy with gluttony and eat everything I am not supposed to. I guess some people are not as out of control as I am but that's my definition.


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## JLB001 (Mar 29, 2004)

ok...that is what I needed to understand.  Sometimes a cheat food can be called a binge in some people's eyes.  Your understanding of a binge is what I thought was a binge.  I haven't had any eatting disorders, so I wanted to be clear on what everyones term was for binge.


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## Stacey (Mar 29, 2004)

or I will bake cookies and eat a ton!!! Or I will eat my dinner- and be Full--but then go in the kitchen for sweet food...and it goes down from there..I keep going back. I'm getting better at not buying the foods I binge on though!!!


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## JLB001 (Mar 29, 2004)

Stacey...a ton to you would be 3?  A ton to me is half the batch at one time. (psst...don't come to my house on scheduled cheat days..cuz I do eat about 12 of them) And I make everyone else join in.


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## Stacey (Mar 29, 2004)

Ya I'm EXACTLY Like JSTAR on the bingeing.. the way she described it.


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## JLB001 (Mar 29, 2004)

ahh....I see.


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## Stacey (Mar 29, 2004)

& now I have a new problem that I don't even want to admit..its real bad!!!!


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## Stacey (Mar 29, 2004)

Jodie-- well when I make homemade cookies--I pretty much eat them all except for a baggie full that the hubby takes to work. I will make the dough, eat a crapload of that to where my tummmmy hurts...then eat like 4 cookies after that. Not good-then eat more the next day b/c I already did the damage..and eat another 3-4 the next day.

I haven't made cookies in weeks do to this!!!


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## JLB001 (Mar 29, 2004)

The way cookies are done here, I mix them up, eat about 4 spoonfuls of dough, bake them, eat 6 or 7 off the pan, then wrap them up and take them out of the apt. that same day.  That way I can't reheat in the micro the next day.  Plus Craig would eat the remmaining left on the plate if they were still in the house.  He has to finish everything off for some reaosn.


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## jstar (Mar 29, 2004)

Hey Stacey, 

Yep it sounds like the same thing I do. I think maybe it would be best if you just don't buy it in the first place. Unfortunately as long as I am living here I cannot help but be surrounded by these foods. Once I do move out I feel confident I can get it under control.


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## atherjen (Mar 29, 2004)

> _*Originally posted by jstar *_
> Stacey, Jen, Jill...thank you all so much . Your words mean more to me than I can describe.
> 
> I just got back from seeing the condo with my mom and my boyfriend (who is going to live their w/me). I liked it, he liked it and she didn't. The only bad thing I could see wrong with it was that it is kinda a hike to the highway and it would be a long way to work so that is the only real reason I had reservations about it. The place had a lot going for it. 2 large bedrooms, new appliances (all staying) low condo fee and low price. It was quite spacious and nice. I sort of got pissy at my mom in the car on the way back because she didn't like it and was trying to talk me out of it. After thinking about it some more I realized I would probably get sick of the commute so I am still gonna keep looking. I have a family friend who is a real estate agent and I am meeting him on Saturday to talk about what I am looking for, hopefully a little closer to the highway. I have impulsive tendecies and I am very eager to move out but I don't want to get all fired up about a place and then realize it wasn't sooo great. Better to take my time and see what's out there I guess. Ridicolous as it sounds part of me really wants to just move out ASAP just so I can get my eating habits under control! But I must keep telling myself: take your time, find the right place.
> ...




I can totally relate, I tend to jump to final decisions sometimes too.. welll I know I did when it came to getting my apartment, all I could think of was getting away from home and having my own place, yadda yadda. I took the first one I looked at-the one I have now-and I abolsutly hate it and have since a week after living here. ha, weird but Im trying to sublease and move home at the end of April. take your time and find something that you know you will love. so that the first time you see it your like "omg this is it" !  no hesitations. 

I dont mind at all hun, Im always here to help and I only want to see you suceed in your goals and optimal health!  lemme know when you need anything! Im just a PM away! 

hope your having a great day at your new job!!


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## Stacey (Mar 29, 2004)

> _*Originally posted by jstar *_
> Hey Stacey,
> 
> Yep it sounds like the same thing I do. I think maybe it would be best if you just don't buy it in the first place. Unfortunately as long as I am living here I cannot help but be surrounded by these foods. Once I do move out I feel confident I can get it under control.



PM Me sweetie.. I don't know if we are talking about the same thing..its what I had issues with last week??!!


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## jstar (Mar 30, 2004)

Thanks Jen! Stace - I must be confused I will PM u both tonight when I get home!

Gotta be quick here:

I am here at work, things are ok. Ohhh I bought a digi cam last night and took some pics I will try to post em up tonight. BEFORE pics, ugh!

My head is in a spin, I am on day one no caffeine, pls forgive me! I am happy to be getting off this stuff. I am sitting here with my water bottle, ahhhhhh.

Gonna go for cardio tonight


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## atherjen (Mar 30, 2004)

pics! YAY!!  I wish I had a digi cam! 
cant wait girlie!! 

haha that feeling will pass. I have been caffiene free for a lil while now. the first few days are ruff but I actaully feel better without! 

have fun with cardio!


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## Stacey (Mar 30, 2004)

Hey! I'm glad things are going gooood with ya at the new job!

Oh I was being retarded yesterday... ignore that comment..


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## greekblondechic (Mar 30, 2004)

hey girl! posting before pics is a tough thing to do.  when i posted mine i cried for two days.  but finally i realized.. its OK.. that's me at my worst and its not like im 300lbs.  it takes guts, but it's good to have pics to see your progress. especially for us ladies who may get frustrated if we dont think we see changes..and then go binge out of frustration!!!!


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## Jill (Mar 30, 2004)

I wont post my fat pics till im skinny-er!


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## hikerchick (Mar 30, 2004)

Hi jstar! I'm so glad I finally had a chance to catch up on your journal. 

I can relate to the binging, although I guess in my case I would call it excessive cheating    Seriously though, what I would do is eat perfectly for about 3-5 days then go on an ice cream binge. I would feel so horrible about it that I would again eat perfectly for about 4-5 days. Bad  cycle. I was/am definitely too hard on myself and am in the process of making positive changes.

I am definitely an all or nothing person. So, for me giving up sugar was a must. If I allow myself a little of it I want ALL of it. I'm like Jodies husband, I have to finish something off so it's not there to cheat with the next day. Where this thinking started I don't know. I feel like I'm definitely on the right path now, finally. I'm still struggling with doing the same type of overeating with other carbs. I work out a lot (like everyone else here  ) so I always justify that I will work it off. I maintain the weight that I'm at but never make improvements and I'm so tired of that. I swear it's harder to lose 5 pounds than anything else for me. I'm still doing the IM contest but not to win, just for me. I don't care if I do better than anyone else, right now it's more of a mental journey for me. One of the reasons why I haven't been posting in my journal (other than I only get on here at night) is that I get so obsessive about food that I think I need a break for awhile. I'm eating well and always get my workouts in, but I'm trying to be a little more relaxed about it. Sorry to have diarrhea of the mouth in your journal, I just wanted you to know that you are not alone. I feel for what you are going through. You can do anything you put your mind to.  I am here to be your #1 supporter!


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## Jill (Mar 30, 2004)

> _*Originally posted by hikerchick *_
> 
> I am definitely an all or nothing person. So, for me giving up sugar was a must. If I allow myself a little of it I want ALL of it. I'm like Jodies husband, I have to finish something off so it's not there to cheat with the next day. Where this thinking started I don't know.



I can totally relate to that Hiker. Great post


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## Stacey (Mar 31, 2004)

Awesome Post Hiker! I am like you when it comes to maintaining the weight I'm at..but I want to lose JUST 5lbs. It just won't come off.  

HI JSTAR


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## jstar (Mar 31, 2004)

Hello lovely ladies! 
I am sneaking on again :shh:

I didn't have time to post my pics but I will as soon as I get a chance (and figure out how to do it). They have been taken and I don't think they are too bad but I want to get into contest shape. I may do a May 15th show if I feel ready, we'll see. I will let everyone here comment and tell me when the time comes. I love my digital camera!

I will post my diet from yesterday too but that will have to wait b/c I don't have it here in front of me.  I did 1 hr of cardio on the elliptical and it felt great. It took a lot for me to force myself to do it but I did it. I am on day 2 no caffeine - just water - wooohooo. The headache today is FAR duller than yesterday. I was SO tired last night I went to bed at 9:30 which is VERY earlier for me. No doubt it was the withdrawals making me loopy and tired all day.

Hiker - you are SO sweet. I loved your post hun and I will ck out your journal and PM you this weekend.

gotta go- ooops!


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## JLB001 (Mar 31, 2004)




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## jstar (Mar 31, 2004)

Hi Jodie! How goes it? I can't play on IM too much with this new job 

crap my headache is back


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## atherjen (Mar 31, 2004)

more water missy!! that will help the headaches. try getting some naturally decafinated herbal teas. I sweeten mine with stevia. they are a blessing!! and realy help with cravings for me(and caffiene). 

a show May 15th!! wayhhoo!!!  
cant wait to see those pics hunniebuns!


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## jstar (Mar 31, 2004)

I'm on my 3rd liter AJ. I was fine all day but I think staring at this PC screen all day isn't helping either!

Yep - maybe!!! I am going to order a suit soon. Red panne velevet. What do you think of this style? #232 and #233 http://www.bodytecfitness.com/2PcDecorated.html

I might get top style #222 or one with push up pads. I need em!


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## atherjen (Mar 31, 2004)

I would need more than push up pads.. Id need a wholelota PADDING!  

ohhh I really love that red one!!! its soooooo cute!!


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## greekblondechic (Mar 31, 2004)

that suit is adorable! cant wait for pics!

its funny how you plan on competing, then decide its not right for u right now, then when you RELAX some, you decide you probably can do it after all!

I think thats a lesson to us all (me especially), being uptight gets us nowhere but unhappy 

*takes notes.. *do not be uptight*


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## jstar (Mar 31, 2004)

@ Jen.  I have nothing to "push up" either....at least after I am dieted down I think the red top might work the best w/my build. I also like that it shows the upper pecs of better and my come in nice, I don't want to block them out ya know?

Greek - I do get uptight about all this stuff but I find I do just fine taking it day by day instead of planning everthing down to the last minute detail. I know I can compete again, I will not give up until I get to my goal. I don't care if I fail (binge) a  million times, I just get right back to it and give it another try. I don't let myself get discouraged because I look to others for inspiration. I see other girls I know compete and do well and it makes me feel like a baby for not pushing myself enough to reach my goal...I see others on this board going for their goals too and that inspires me so much.


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## jstar (Mar 31, 2004)

3/30 Meals

M1
1 cup Fiber One
1 scoop US
1/3 cup blueberries
1 ew
335  63C  33P  4F 

M2
5 oz chicken deli
salad
200  5C  35P  4F 

M3
2 scoops US
1/2 ew
apple
350  29C  41P  8F 

M4
3 ff cheese
3 oz turkey
1/2 cup lf cottage cheese
1 cup Fiber One
390  62C  52P  3F 

1275  159C  161P  19F 

Cardio: 1 hr elliptical


----------



## atherjen (Mar 31, 2004)

did you have a busy day missy? only 4 meals.. cals are perdy low too.. (need some fat!)  

1hr on the elliptical rollercoaster!!  I walk right off that thing!! I dont know how you do it!


----------



## jstar (Mar 31, 2004)

Jen I just ordered the red suit 

Yesterday I was getting over my binge so yeah not much food there. Plus with it being the first day of the new job I couldn't really take a break to eat more than once. (I did today though!)

Tonight I wanted to do weights & cardio and did nothing!! My commute home was RE - DICULOUS! I am going to see if I can switch my hrs to 8-4 or maybe 7-3. I need to get my workouts in dammit.

Oh well with this headache I wouldn't have been able to lift much anyways.

Oh, I am TRYING to get my pics downloaded or uploaded or whatever but I can't figure it out


----------



## hikerchick (Mar 31, 2004)

> _*Originally posted by jstar *_
> I'm on my 3rd liter AJ. I was fine all day but I think staring at this PC screen all day isn't helping either!
> 
> Yep - maybe!!! I am going to order a suit soon. Red panne velevet. What do you think of this style? #232 and #233 http://www.bodytecfitness.com/2PcDecorated.html
> ...



oooooohhh!! sexy sexy!!   I love the red suit, it's definitely my favorite. I would need a truck load of push up pads!


----------



## atherjen (Apr 1, 2004)

HAPP Y BIRTHDAY 

  :bounce:


----------



## BabsieGirl (Apr 1, 2004)

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :bounce: :bounce:


----------



## Stacey (Apr 1, 2004)

HAPPY BIRTHDAY SWEETIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Hope you have a WONDERFUL DAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


----------



## Jill (Apr 1, 2004)

Have a super b-day sweets!! BTW, I am mad at you-I bought "all bran", and cant stop eating it. I tried it with Steves skim milk and it was like heaven!!! The bad side is that eating so much has made me REAL sick-Geeze I've been binging on bran! needless to say, I threw the remainder of the box into the garbage! Thats how I control myself


----------



## jstar (Apr 1, 2004)

Thanks Everybody :HUGS:    

I am sorry Jill. Did you get the one with Xtra fiber? The box I get only comes in a small size (yet Fiber One comes in a regular size box). Oh boy don't overeat it - with that much fiber things get uncomfortable (speaking from experience).

You guys, its POURING here and it's supposed to rain til Monday when it might actually change over to snow. Well at least we spring ahead this weekend. Is it just me or does it seem like we have been waiting to turn the clocks ahead forever this year?


----------



## Jill (Apr 1, 2004)

Any plans for your b-day???? Do they involve cake


----------



## jstar (Apr 1, 2004)

Oh yeah I am going out to eat this weekend with my boyfriend. He is taking me to Chili's (my fave) for my b-day. I like them because they have a healthy menu and you can get veggies and grilled chicken..mmm. Then my mom is getting me a gift cert so I can buy new sneakers. I have had the same ones for I guess 3-4 years now. My friend is coming out with me on Monday after work so I can get my new sneakers. Any recommendations?


----------



## jstar (Apr 1, 2004)

> _*Originally posted by Jill *_
> Any plans for your b-day???? Do they involve cake



Ugh. My mom always buys a cake and I never eat it.  It's like a tradition. Well the cake is really for my dad and brothers ha ha. I might freeze a piece and eat it after my competition or when I reach my goal. 

 I should post of pic of my cake  so you guys can enjoy it too! 

errr - as soon as I figure out how to do that!


----------



## Stacey (Apr 1, 2004)

oh yum I love Chilis healthy menu!!!! 

I like my Nike's And I have heard New Balance are awesome

omg girl I go through like 3 sneakers a year~ Or more!!!! 

Have a wonderful birthday!!!!


----------



## atherjen (Apr 1, 2004)

freeze your cake?  thats hilarious! dont let it get freezer burnt!!  

I dont think we have Chilis here? we suck.. .

I love Adidas and Nike.. but New Balance are awesome too!! but you pretty much have to get the $$$ ones to get any good ones in that brand!


----------



## jstar (Apr 1, 2004)

frozen cake is yummy

I have trouble finding shoes/sneakers that fit that is why I don't buy too many. Some brands are too narrow because I have wide feet. The ones I have now are Avia.

My friend was saying you can go to nike.com and create a custom pair of sneakers for yourself. I think they are called Nike Shocks(?)


----------



## Jill (Apr 1, 2004)

I like new balance-the come in various widths!! Thats what Ive bought over the last few years!


----------



## atherjen (Apr 1, 2004)

and they are soooooooo comfyyy... well the ones that are 150$   + are.


----------



## aggies1ut (Apr 1, 2004)

WTF, 3-4 year old sneakers? I run 4x a week for a total of around 30 miles. You are supposed to get new sneakers every 6 months, or every 500 miles. It doesn't matter if they still look good. After 6 months, the cushioning wears down. Also, I know quite a bit about selecting the right shoe for you foot, but my advice tends to be more runner specific.


----------



## aggies1ut (Apr 1, 2004)

Also, rather than being concerned with a specific brand, try on a variety of shoes. Everyone's foot is different and what model shoe or what brand of shoe that works for one, may not work for another.


----------



## jstar (Apr 1, 2004)

Yeah like I said I have had a hard time finding ones that fit right. Still I know my sneaks are beyond old


----------



## jstar (Apr 1, 2004)

3/31

Meals:
M1
1 cup Fiber One
1 scoop protein
1/2 cp ew
1/3 cp blueberries
335  63C  33P  4F 

M2
5 oz turkey
2 ff cheese
salad
260  9C  45P  4F

M3
2 sc protein
apple
320  29C  34P  8F 

M4
1 cup oats
3/4 scoop protein
1/2 cp eggwhites
440  58C  38P  9F 

M5
3 oz ground turkey 99%FF
2 ff cheese
1 slice turkey
ketchup
1.25 cups Fiber One
360  63C  45P  1F 

1715  222C  195P  26F 

No workout


----------



## Stacey (Apr 1, 2004)

hope your having a wonderful birthday!!!!


----------



## jstar (Apr 1, 2004)

awww thanks Stacey, I am!

I am trying to get my pics up here. I successfully loaded my pics from my camera to Kodak EasyShare. It is so cool how you can brighten the photos or get "red eye" out. This is a fun toy


----------



## atherjen (Apr 1, 2004)

meals look great today Star! and no bday cake? dedicated golly!  but your right May15th comes fast! 

pics! yay! cant wait!! I wish I had a fun toy like that to play with!


----------



## greekblondechic (Apr 1, 2004)

I have wide feet, Adidas fit me better than New Balance

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  

How can you go so long w/ the same shoes? As soon as mine "die" I absolutely need new ones because my feet and ankles start hurting because they need support


----------



## jstar (Apr 2, 2004)

Well yesterday was going fine until last night:

I hadn't heard from my boyfriend all day. He never called to wish me a happy birthday so finally I called him at 9pm last night. Basically he broke up with me over the phone. I am a wreck today. I was totally blindsided by this. We hadn't even been arguing at all and to my knowledge everything was great with us. We were looking at condos and talking marriage; now he doesn't want any part of it. I can't make sense of anything right now, I can't believe this is happening, and the way he did it too. Ha, at first I thought it was an April Fool's joke but he was serious.  He didn't want to tell me the reason why he wanted to do this; I kept asking and begging him to tell me because after 4.5 yrs down the drain I think the least he could do was give me a reason.  I sort of got something outta him: he thinks I am not independent enough! I gather that he thinks this because my mom and I have a close relationship, and yes, I do admit that she still does some things for me because I live at home, not because I ask her to. I have lived on my own before at school (before I met HIM) and did all my own laundry, bills, worked, cleaned, cooked, and pulled an A- average. Yeah, I am trying to move out and become more independent, but the only reason I haven't is due to money. There are MANY people my age, in their late 20's and early 30's still living at home in Mass. because it is damn expensive not too! Anyways...getting back to the subject....I think he got rubbed the wrong way by my mom and now he wants to back out. You see I am the one with the down payment so the condo was to be in my name only. His father has a lot of dough but is stingy and wants him to wait til he dies to inherit it so basically it is up to me if I want a wedding, a place to live, it is my money that has to pay for it! I was actually fine with this because he will inherit some $ and a house with no mortgage so I figured I wouldn't have a ton of worries about money later in life. My now ex was fine with this too (with his name not being on the condo). Then he brought it up a few weeks ago that he wanted me to put his name on the condo too, because his dad won't help us out unless his name is on the condo. I thought it over and said no. My 1st inclination was to say yes because that is just the type of person I am. I trust(ed) him. But I knew it would be wise to say no for now. If we got married it would be 1/2 his anyways after 5 years.  My mom found out about this and told me don't do it (she is just trying to protect me) and I stupidly told him my mom said it wasn't a good idea for his name to be on it. Ever since then he started withdrawing from me and not showing any affection whatsoever. He didn't even call me - I had to call him! He was like "I wasn't going to call, I thought you'd figure it out." F-in a-hole!!! I am here at work and cannot concentrate for the life of me.


----------



## Stacey (Apr 2, 2004)

OMG!!! Sweetie I am SOOO Sorry!! That is horrible!! I can't believe he wasn't even going to call you and tell you. Thats so rude! Geeez I'm shocked too--thought you guys were doing great just like you did. 
That's insane! I'm sure he is totally regretting breaking up with you already

I am here for you if you need to talk!!!


----------



## jstar (Apr 2, 2004)

Thanks hun He said he still loves me but that he is not happy. I just think some guys don't want a future, it is a shame. Plus he led me to believe it the whole time...I feel like I can never trust anyone again.


----------



## Stacey (Apr 2, 2004)

Ugggg I'm soo sorrrry girl!!!

I hear ya.. I feel like my husband doesn't want to have a baby with me!!  He's being a complete A-Hole about it all. 

We don't need men I swear!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! All they do is HURT Us!!!


----------



## jstar (Apr 2, 2004)

Amen to that!

Stacey - I thought he was all for the baby? Did he change his mind or just start acting weird?

Ya know they say women are impossible to figure out but crap men are WAY WORSE!!!!


----------



## Stacey (Apr 2, 2004)

HELL YA.. MEN ARE WAYYY WORSE

I thought he was ready also!! Guess He really wasn't. I don't know??!!! I Know he was happy when my pregnancy test came back negative last week. So that should have been my first Clue.


----------



## atherjen (Apr 2, 2004)

Ahhh Star I am SOOO sorry to hear that hun!! thats terrible!!! I hope your doing ok!!  
men make life ruff. gosh-that it totally shocking and downright rude and disrespectful of him to not even call or give an explanation! MEN!!  
hang in there hunny! I truly hope that things can be sorted out, and if you need to talk Im here!


----------



## Dale Mabry (Apr 2, 2004)

Way too much estrogen going on in here.  

I would appreciate a retraction of that blanket statement towards all men.  

Anyway, it really sucks that you had to go through that Jstar, especially on your B-day.  It amazes me how people handle situations in such a juvenile manner.  I cannot believe the way he did this stuff, just unbelievable.  From what you said I would bet he thinks your mom pulls all the strings.  In general, I would say this is a bad thing, but it would have been really dumb to put his name on that lease so in that respect your mom was right.  I think the total irony in this story is that his dad was pulling the strings on his side so it seems he was doing the exact thing that set him off.  I guess it is better you find out now rather than later when you have kids and such.  If you are meant to be he will be back.

Oh, and Stacey, that sucks on your story too.  You and your hubby have alot to talk about.  I see it all the time, women come in to my work and you can tell the husbands want nothing to do with the pregnancy and it seems like such a hassle to them.  In the end they generally come around though.

In both your and Jstar's case, it seems the guy has no idea what he wants.  I would guess that you are in a relationship with someone your own age.  I read somewhere that we guys mature later than women, maybe that's it.


----------



## jstar (Apr 2, 2004)

Hi Dale 

That was such a great post! I am happy to get the opinion of a guy. I definitely don't think "all men are jerks." I am just feeling a little heartbroken right now 

You are so right-on about him not knowing what he wants. I think he has some fears, like my mom interfering (which she doesn't - she isn't one of those controlling moms).  I also think he fears that if he moves in a condo without his name on it too that he will have nowhere to go if things don't go according to plan. You see he is on section 8 and once he moves out and moves in with me he loses his voucher and has to go back on a LONG list.  It may take years for him to get picked again.  It would be a risk for both of us but I would think if he cared he would want to be with me. I just don't get it. 

Stacey - having a baby is a big shock, a big change I mean. Maybe he needs some more time to get used to the idea(?) You did say before that he was getting excited about it, so he kinda seems to have mixed feelings and maybe some fears about how things will change once the baby comes. I am just assuming, but I think this type of reaction is common for first time dads. He will be there for you, so will we.


----------



## jstar (Apr 2, 2004)

Alright, enough relationship pity talk....here is my diet from yesterday:

4/1 - no cake 

M1
3/4 cup oats
3/4 scoop protein
1/2 cup ew
375  44C  35.5P  7.5F    

M2
1/2 cup oats
salad
5 oz turkey
260  13.5C  48P  3F

M3
1 scoop protein
1/2 cup lf cottage cheese
200  11C  30P  5F 

M4
2 oz cooked ground turkey 99% FF
ketchup, onions
85  7.5C  12P  .5F 

M5
1 cup oats
1 scoop protein
1 TBL PB
1/2 cup ew
575  61C  46P  18F    

M6 
2 multigrain slices bread
260  46C  8P 4F 

1755  183C  179.5P  38F 

no workout again.

M3 & M4 were close, like one hour apart.

M6...woke up in the middle of the night, couldn't sleep


----------



## Dale Mabry (Apr 2, 2004)

How is he in section 8 housing if his father is rich?

Also, from what I have seen these days, it seems that folks seem to get in a relationship and expect their significant other to remove themselves from their past life.  It really is weird if ya ask me.  I see it happening to all of my friends and I feel bad.  Even when we try to include the spouses they want nothing to do with it.  I could never imagine having my life without my friends and family, and I am not even that close to my family.


----------



## jstar (Apr 2, 2004)

4/2
Meals
M1
1/2 cup oats
1/2 cup ew
1 scoop protein
330  32C  37P  7F 

M2
salad, 1 TBL ff Italian
4.5 oz cooked ground turkey 99% FF
175  8C  32P  1.3F 

M3
Pure Protein Bar
170  16C  21P  4F 

M4
1 slice multigrain bread
2 ff cheese
190  27C  14P  1F 

M5
1/2 cup oats
1 TBL PB
245  29C  9P  11F 

M6
2 scoops protein
1/5 cup ew
1 cup grapes
360  39C  37P  8F 

M7
2 slices mg bread
260  46C  8P  4F 

1730  197.5C  158P  36.3F    

Workout = Chest, Back and Abs
1 hr ellipitical


----------



## JLB001 (Apr 2, 2004)

Men are only good for their penis and lifting heavy objects....

Jstar...I am sorry to hear about the things that are going on.  I wish you the best in it all.


----------



## jstar (Apr 2, 2004)

> _*Originally posted by Dale Mabry *_
> How is he in section 8 housing if his father is rich?
> 
> Also, from what I have seen these days, it seems that folks seem to get in a relationship and expect their significant other to remove themselves from their past life.  It really is weird if ya ask me.  I see it happening to all of my friends and I feel bad.  Even when we try to include the spouses they want nothing to do with it.  I could never imagine having my life without my friends and family, and I am not even that close to my family.



His dad is really cheap, he thinks he should wait til he passes away before he gives his son any money...some people who have money are weird like that. My ex has bipolar disorder, aka manic depression. He only works part time and gets a check from the gov, which is not much. He really is a great guy and always treated me well. I think he is fearful of how things "may" turn out. Well, life is full of risks but if you never take any you end up depriving yourself of what could have been.  I am keeping an open mind and trying to convince myself that everything happens for a reason. That everything that happens to me only makes me a better person. I am trying REALLY hard.


----------



## jstar (Apr 2, 2004)

> _*Originally posted by JLB001 *_
> Men are only good for their penis and lifting heavy objects....
> 
> Jstar...I am sorry to hear about the things that are going on.  I wish you the best in it all.



 thanks Jodie


----------



## sara (Apr 2, 2004)

> _*Originally posted by jstar *_
> 4/2
> Meals
> M1
> ...



Hey jstar- meals look yummy  
Just wondering, where did the 7 F came from?


----------



## JLB001 (Apr 3, 2004)

Jstar...find one that will treat you like you are #1.  Craig's parents raised him the right way.  He will put other people's needs before his.  And does everything he can to be sure I am happy.  It's something I take for granted at times, which I shouldn't do.  He's the best.


----------



## jstar (Apr 3, 2004)

> _*Originally posted by sara *_
> Hey jstar- meals look yummy
> Just wondering, where did the 7 F came from?



3g = 1/2 cup oats
4g = 1 scoop Ultra Size protein

US & oats = YUMMY


----------



## jstar (Apr 3, 2004)

> _*Originally posted by JLB001 *_
> Jstar...find one that will treat you like you are #1.  Craig's parents raised him the right way.  He will put other people's needs before his.  And does everything he can to be sure I am happy.  It's something I take for granted at times, which I shouldn't do.  He's the best.




Does he have a brother 

I can tell he is a good one


----------



## greekblondechic (Apr 3, 2004)

Honey I am sooo sorry that your ex did that, it was a really F*$%* up thing to do! I think Dale is right, that mainly he's scared of your mom controlling you.. many men fear their mother-in-laws!! I do not know if his bi-polar disorder was a factor in what he did, altho it may very well be.  I hope he is seeking psych help and/or medication because it is a difficult thing to live with I can imagine. 

Stacey, I think maybe your hubby is afraid because of money and also, a lot of husbands feel neglected when they have a baby because the mothers focus is almost 100% on the baby.  

And as for me, I will never date a guy my age.. I feel like a babysitter if i do!!


----------



## jstar (Apr 3, 2004)

Greekie - 

He is on meds and has a therapist and doctor..lots of support. I mean he said he ran his situation with me by his therapist and friends and they all agreed that he was right. They didn't tell him to break up with me but he did that on his own. I know it's all due to irrational fears on his part, but if he isn't happy I don't think there is much I can do to change that. If he needs time to straighten out his thoughts then I guess I should let him do that. I have not called him and I am trying hard to preoccupy myself so that I won't. Weird but at times like this I usually revert to my bingeing behaviors but this time I don't feel compelled to do so. It won't change things or make me feel any better so why bother, right?


----------



## JLB001 (Apr 3, 2004)

No brother Jstar, Craig is an only child.  Spoiled rotten, but a good one.

I think as pretty as you are on the inside and out, you'll have no problem finding a good one.


----------



## greekblondechic (Apr 3, 2004)

No, it wont make you feel any better, just worse.. which leaves us to wonder why we ever do it anyway?


----------



## jstar (Apr 3, 2004)

Thanks Jodie. I know you are very deserving of a wonderful guy like Craig. I am deserving too - I just have to be more selective and find me a good one I am really lonely now, kinda don't know what to do with myself.

***Note to self : DO NOT CALL HIM****

Guys, pls don't let me call him


----------



## jstar (Apr 3, 2004)

Greekie yeah I don't know why we do it either, its just a temporary fix. I don't have the urge to eat now, but I have the urge to shop...grrrr should I be fat or broke?


----------



## JLB001 (Apr 3, 2004)

Hang in there Girlie.   It'll take time for those urges to pass.

Go to the gym instead of shopping.  You will have to eat soemthing, just make good choices in what you eat, even when you don't feel like eatting.   Being depressed over a guy can be a vicious cycle.


----------



## greekblondechic (Apr 3, 2004)

I'd rather be broke than fat.  

*note to self.. start shopping more often as self-therapy*


----------



## jstar (Apr 3, 2004)

> _*Originally posted by greekblondechic *_
> I'd rather be broke than fat.
> 
> *note to self.. start shopping more often as self-therapy*



 NOOOOOO greekie don't do it.  I am not broke because I live at home and save, save, save.  I always buy things on sale too.l I have tons of clothes and I have jeans and stuff in a smaller size as a goal to fit into....its a waste. Another temporary fix. Last night I was in the gym from 8-930. I was the only one doing freaking cardio in the cardio area at 9 pm! What a loser but what the hell else am I gonna do? I can't binge - I will gain weight  and be more depressed, I can't shop - I will spend $ and I really shouldn't, I am not gonna go out drinking ...I really feel messed up like I don't know what to do with myself though! Ugh! None of my friends are around today. I told one of my friends about the breakup and she is calling me now to make sure I haven't called HIM. I was supposed to go out with her tonight but she has to go to something else so she can't....Tomorrow I think I am going to the Sunday posing session to practice walking in my heels. They have them every Sunday 12-2 and its a good chance to meet all the girls and get out of the house. They all want me to do the April 24th show and think I am ready...lol. Well see.


----------



## greekblondechic (Apr 3, 2004)

you should go to the posing session! it might help u decide if u wanna do it or not! 

and dont call him!!!!

i feel u on u dont know what to do to make urself feel better.. but for me right now i dont got any bills to pay...


----------



## jstar (Apr 4, 2004)

Well I didn't call him 

Last night I went out to coffee with my best friend and told her everything. She was awesome and gave me a little pep talk, it made me feel a lot better. Then I dropped her off and went to a couple places by myself looking for sneakers. I am obsessed with trying to find a white and pink pair. I couldn't really find any that fit me right. Asics are the best fit for me but I might wait for them to go on sale cuz they are expensive. Oh well. I bought an outfit for the gym though. Actually, something new to wear to the posing session today.

I am about to get on the elliptical machine in the cellar to get in some cardio before the posing session. When I get back I am going to the gym for legs and possibly more cardio (well see how I feel about that!)

Jodie - great advice. This is what I did on Friday night. I had a long, hard workout and it actually destressed me alot more than shopping or eating. I must remember this!

Are you listening Greekie?  

Ah, men. Why would I ever let anyone bring me down like this? I feel like I am going through a lot of soul searching right now. This is good for me, even though it is painful. He was really my first real relationship. We started dating when I was 23, straight outta college so maybe I never really had a real chance to figure out who I am....He is 8.5 yrs older than me and has been in a few relationships so I guess I wasn't as prepared for things ending like this. For so long I thought this was the one, this is it, but now my life is turned upside down, it's weird. All I know is I have got to take care of me and be a little selfish now...do what I want to do and focus on making ME happy.


----------



## JLB001 (Apr 4, 2004)

Jstar..they bring us down because we are human.  Just think if we were a black widow spider.,,,we would just eat them after sex.


----------



## atherjen (Apr 4, 2004)

Jodie that is hilarious!! 

Star- thats the attitude hun, do whats best for YOU.. and thats not selfish... it is your life! and you need to be happy too!!  

Im so glad that your friend was able to cheer you up and be there for support too. always helps I know. 
so have you dediced for sure on that comp next month?? 

I have white and pink sneakers! dont wear them too too much. but then again cant wear them in the winter outside!  

ohhhhh and did you get the pics figured out yet hunniebuns?


----------



## Jill (Apr 4, 2004)

Hey J-star, Ive been keeping up with your situation, just havent had time to post.

Keep your head up high-IMO-men can deff be imature, pricks, dicks, etc...but we all know that already. Be strong girl, you can get through this, and not turning to food, I am so friggin proud of ya!!! And if you slip, oh well, dont beat yourself up. I believe in you.  Take things one day at a time. Keep those spirits up sunshine! I find, the best stress reliever for me, is doing cardio! BONUS!

Oh, I saw nike pink and white runners the other day, REAL cute! Almost bought em, but I had just bought 2 new pairs a few days before, I held myself back!


----------



## JLB001 (Apr 4, 2004)

I'm sorry...that thought popped in my head when I was writing it.  Think I saw it on the discovery channel.


----------



## gwcaton (Apr 4, 2004)

> _*Originally posted by JLB001 *_
> Jstar..they bring us down because we are human.  Just think if we were a black widow spider.,,,we would just eat them after sex.




can a guy visit here ?


----------



## aggies1ut (Apr 4, 2004)

Too many people buy sneakers because they think they are "cute," and they aren't right for the activity they want to do or aren't right for their feet. For workout shoes, it's about fit, not style. Just keep that in mind when choosing a pair.


----------



## jstar (Apr 4, 2004)

Hey everyone

Jodie....omg I am laughing so hard right now PS - I think you are scaring off the men from visting my journal Sorry guys I am just feeling the "girl power" thing right now, no offense 

Ohhh Jen - yeah I saw those sneaks you are talking about. Nikes usually don't fit me well, I tried on the pink/white Nikes and they wern't really wide enough.  I don't have a clue about downloading the pictures. I have Kodak EasyShare. Easy my ass!....I think I need to download it to a blank CD first (which I need to buy). If anyone is familiar with this type of camera pls let me know. I didn't see how to download to the hard drive in the handbook so I don't think you can do it that way.

Jill - Nice to see ya here again You are RIGHT ON about the cardio, and throwing some heavy weight around helps to when you are frustrated or mad 

Hi gwcaton Don't be afraid, we don't bite like the black widows

Aggies1ut - Jeesh I have made that mistake before I am real picky on new sneakers because they have to be comfy so I can do my workouts.


----------



## jstar (Apr 4, 2004)

4/3

Meals
M1
3/4 cup oats
1 scoop protein
1/2 cup ew
405  45C  39.5P  8.5F 

M2
2 slices multigrain bread 
1 ff cheese
290  48C  13P  4F 

M3
2 slices multigrain bread
2 ff cheese
320  50C  18P  4F 

M4
3/4 cup oats
1 scoop protein
1/2 cup eggwhites
405  45C  39.5P  8.5F 

M5
lemon yogurt
1/2 oz almonds
2 slices white bread
1 ff cheese
1 TBL bran
*pizza crust*
520  85C  27P  10F 

M6
**2 bulkie rolls 
360  62C  16P  6F 

2300  335C 152.5P  41F 

No workout

Poor food choices, I know. Too much bread    I will be an angel tomorrow though


----------



## jstar (Apr 4, 2004)

4/4

M1
2 scoops protein
240  10C  34P  8F 

45 min elliptical

M2
mini soy pita
3/4 cup veggies
4.25 oz cooked ground turkey 99% FF
1 ff cheese

TBC...


----------



## JLB001 (Apr 4, 2004)

A kodak easyshare ls443?  does it have the dock station with it?


----------



## jstar (Apr 4, 2004)

4/4 Stuff:

I just got back from the posing session and all I can say is wow, I feel like a million bucks:bounce:  

I got a ton of positive feedback from the coaches (Cathy & Linda) and I am now really confident about doing the show on the 24th. They both said I don't seem nervous at all anymore when I walk on stage and hit my poses. That suprised me because I haven't put on my heels in 6 months....but it comes right back like riding a bike I guess. I kinda have a "who gives a shit attitude" so I guess that comes across as confidence on the stage I wore short shorts and a tank top so they could see my physique and tell me their opinion if I could be ready in time and I was like "yeah but I need to lose more lbs don't I?" and they both shook their heads and called me crazy. They gave us a lot of great advice and tips too, I am glad I went. I always learn something new everytime I go.  I also come back with a surge of confidence, they are such an invaluable resource, I could never be so confident without all the support I get there.  

Oh with my diet:
I am gonna clean it up way more, esp. cutting back on sodium. Not sodium depletion, just the excess sodium because I have a lot in my diet right now and I am holding water.
*Bread = as of this moment on, no more. I crave it too much and it does bloat me somewhat.
*Dairy = I am almost out of ff cheese and lf cottage cheese. I will use up what I have left then cut it out (too much sodium).
*Fruit = It doesn't make a huge dif if I cut it out or not. I will limit it to just the berries in the AM with my Fiber One.
*Sodium laden products = No more ff dressings, condiments, splenda...it's gone as of right now!
*Diet Soda = at 2 weeks out it will be gone. 
*Deli Turkey = crap my mom just bought me 1.5 lbs of it. That will last maybe a week so after that is gone, no more.
*Protein powders = Linda says try to eliminate them totally and rely on real food. I will give it a shot.

I am going to cook a bunch of meals tonight so I can grab them from the fridge and go straight to work. I don't have time to prepare things in the morning, which is why I rely on protein powder a lot 

Oh yeah - they also said there is a huge report this month in Consumer Reports about supplements. We are getting a copy next week of the report but everyone should check it out.  They said even the ephedra free products are dangerous and can cause kidney problems and all kinds of other problems. Also most of the "fat burner" supps are a waste of money and are actually harmful too. I don't use any, but I know alot of people here do so beware When I get my copy I will post up more info on this stuff!

Well I am going to get my sneakers and look for an outfit for the "themed sportswear" round. You have to dress up like an athlete, such as a baseball player, basketball, cheerleader, tennis player, whatever. I have to figure out something for that round.  

Next week's session is Saturday so I might try to spray tan myself this week so I can "see" myself better!

I'm feeling pretty good today, pretty motivated 

Hope everyone is having a great weekend. Too bad it's almost over~!


----------



## jstar (Apr 4, 2004)

> _*Originally posted by JLB001 *_
> A kodak easyshare ls443?  does it have the dock station with it?



I didn't get a dock station Jodie and it didn't come with one. Its a Kodak CX6330.
I have the Easyshare CD and downloaded my pics from my camera to the "easyshare" album but how can I link it up to my journal? I tried emailing pictures to myself but it doesn't work?


----------



## JLB001 (Apr 4, 2004)

let me go look and see if I can figure it out.  I think I have that program.


----------



## JLB001 (Apr 4, 2004)

how are you saving the photos?  as a jpeg?


----------



## atherjen (Apr 4, 2004)

WAHOOO sounds like things are going awesome Star!! your attitude has really taken a huge turn for the best!!!  ou can TOTALLY do this show and it sounds like you coachs are beind you all the way! go for it hun! you have the drive in your right now, might as well make that "who gives a shit" motto a whirl!!


----------



## gwcaton (Apr 4, 2004)

> Hi gwcaton Don't be afraid, we don't bite like the black widows



Thanks, I was kinda leary about coming in


----------



## greekblondechic (Apr 4, 2004)

omg thats awesome news jstar!!!!!!!!!!!!!


----------



## jstar (Apr 4, 2004)

Thanks everyone I do feel more "driven" - or like I have some unspent energy just dying to get out!

Jodie - I hooked up the UB (I think that is what you call it) cable from my camera to the PC, it downloaded my pics to easyshare. I don't think they are in jpeg, that may be the problem. If you can figure out how to get my pics from easyshare to my hard drive or to my journal, please let me know. Thanks babe


----------



## jstar (Apr 5, 2004)

4/4 - Again

M1
2 scoops protein
240  10C  34P  8F

45 min elliptical

M2
4.25 oz cooked ground turkey 99% ff
1 ff cheese
1 mini soy pita
3/4 cup veggies
345  35C  47P  2F

M3
1 ff cheese
2 oz turkey
90  2C  18P  1F

M4
3 cups Fiber One**I kept going back for more!
1/4 cup blueberries
1/2 cup eggwhites
465  158C  27P  6F

M5
1.25 cups Fiber One (yeah more)
1/2 cup eggwhites
205  60C  20P  1.5F

1345  266C  146P  18.5F
Fiber = 119G


----------



## jstar (Apr 5, 2004)

4/5 Stuff:

The deadline for my application is 4/10. Oops! I have to get on the ball I am cutting it close! 

I am going to the gym tonight to do a full body workout and cardio. I am so excited it will be light out when I leave the gym, woo hoo!

I am not sleeping good at all. The past few nights I have just been laying there in bed til 3-4 am. I just keep thinking about "him" and trying hard not to!


----------



## Jill (Apr 5, 2004)

My dig camera was messed too. If I took pics, then hooked up the cameral with the usb cable, the pics would upload as jpegs fine. BUT, if my memory card is in the camera (hold like 50X more pics), it will not upload the pics. I never did figure it out. I just bought a new printer, with a slot that you put the memory card in, screw the camera!


----------



## jstar (Apr 5, 2004)

Mine won't let me save them as jpegs...weird. It will let you email them so I emailed one to myself and got an error message. That was 2 days ago and then today the pic arrived in my yahoo mail. Weird, huh? Oh, it's a picture of my cat - let's see if I can post it here...brb


----------



## jstar (Apr 5, 2004)

forget it!


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## Jill (Apr 5, 2004)

That pic stuff gets really annoying eh?

Hey, hows the water drinking going???


----------



## jstar (Apr 5, 2004)

4/5
Meals:

M1
1 cup Fiber One
1 scoop protein
1/2 cup blueberries
1/2 cup ew

M2
4.25 oz turkey
salad
1/2 cup oats

M3
4 oz turkey
salad
1/2 cup oats

M4 POST
2 scoops protein
1/4 cup oats
1/4 cup ew

M5
2 cups Fiber One

Workout - 
I wish I did cardio buttt... I didn't:

BB Squats
DB Lunges
DB 1 leg DL (form sucked!)
Seated Cable Rows
DB Incline BP
Wide PD (only one set)
DB Laterals
DB Presses
Incline DB Bicep Curls
Tricep Rope Pulldowns
Ball crunches


----------



## naturaltan (Apr 6, 2004)

good luck with the comp J!  Sounds like you're ready to take some hardware home.  

When you email a pic, when extension does it have?


----------



## Paynne (Apr 6, 2004)

Don't know if this will help or hurt.  If I'm being too confusing just ignore this post 

Connect the camera to the computer with the USB cable. 

If you're using windows XP click on start->My Computer, or "explorer" if using another flavor of windows.  Double click on "C:".  Make a new folder , whatever you want to name it, to hold the pix.

Open another "My Computer" or "explorer" window.  You should see a "removeable drive" icon, that's the camera.  Go in there, and somewhere you should see the pix.  Hightlight them and hold the "control" and "c" buttons at the same time.  

Go to the "My Computer" or "explorer" window where you made the new directory.  Hit the "control" and "v" buttons at the same time.  

At least now you know where the pix are on your puter and what they are called.  Uploading them from there should be easier.

If I was confusing just ignore me and I'll go away


----------



## jstar (Apr 6, 2004)

I am sooo busy at work today!

Jill -  I'm back on the caffeine! I had to it was too much for me & after jerk-o dumped me, well, it was the wrong time to give it up. I will HAVE to drink more water and ditch the caff. though in another week or so for depletion anyways but I am enjoying myself till then!

NT - Thanks!  when you say take some hardware home are you talking about me stealing a computer or me taking home a trophy?

Paynne - Wow thanks, I will give this a shot when I get home! Thank you soooo much, and no you could never be a pain!


----------



## Stacey (Apr 6, 2004)

ohhh wow I need to catch up in here!! SORRY I haven't been in here..its been pretty crazy at work!!!!

Hope your doing okay honey!!


----------



## atherjen (Apr 6, 2004)

would you hurry up and get some pics working!! Im dying here!   
lol jk hun!! GUESS WHAT daddy bought a digi cam yestarday!  cant wait til I move home now!!!! wahoo


----------



## jstar (Apr 6, 2004)

Hey Stacey - I am busy too!! At least the day goes by faster! How was your interview???? :fingerscrossed:

Jen - I like to keep people in suspense


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## naturaltan (Apr 6, 2004)

hardware ... taking home a trophy of course.   I'm a dad, I can't go around condoning stealing.      I have a hard enough time explaining to our daughter why mommy downloads music without paying for it.


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## jstar (Apr 7, 2004)

Macros from 4/5 since I can't edit that post:

M1 335  63C    33P     4F
M2 308  32C    34.4P  5F
M3 308  32C    34.4P  5F
M4 345  23.5C 44P     9.5F
M5 120  48C    4P       2F

1416  198.5C  149.8P  25.5F

Meals for 4/6:

M1
1.3 cups Fiber One
1/2 cup ew
1/2 cup blueberries
276  80.4C  20.2P  2F

M2
4 oz turkey
salad
1/2 cup oats
308  32C  34.4P  5F

M3
same as M2
308  32C  34.4P  5F

M4
*not really a meal*
1 TBL PB
95  2C  4P  8F

M5
1/2 oz almonds
1 scoop protein
1 cup Fiber One
325  55C  23P  14F

M5
2 cups Fiber One
1 scoop protein
1/3 cup blueberries
1 slice MG bread
475  131C  13P  6F

then I had: 
4 slices multigrain bread
1 ff cheese
1 mini soy pita
650  109C  31P  8F

2437  441.4C  160P  48F

I was starving last night, probably because I have had low cals the past few days. I guess my appetite is coming back. I will be "cleaner" tomorrow and do 1hr cardio!!!! I was gonna do my cardio last night but I had errands and lost track of time.


----------



## greekblondechic (Apr 7, 2004)

I think its good that you ate when you felt like you needed to! The body doesn't have that hunger signal for nothin!


----------



## aggies1ut (Apr 7, 2004)

Wowie, 2 cups of Fiber One. No probs with your bowels I'm guessing. jk


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## ncgirl21 (Apr 7, 2004)

I LOVE fiber one, but................ does your stomach not start hurting if you've eaten a lot of it?  I could easily eat 1 + cups a day, but I try not to because I thought too much fiber was bad for you- any thoughts on that?


Your doing great sweetie, I can't wait to see your pictures!!


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## JLB001 (Apr 7, 2004)

Jstar...are you getting excited???  

Did you ever pick a suit fabric sample???


----------



## Stacey (Apr 7, 2004)

Wow Girl-- I'm catching up on your journal.. and I feel like I'm reading about a new person. I love how driven you are and focused. You are going to kickass on stage. You do have the right additude. When is the show??

Your doing Great girl!!!!

Oh my interview went okay--thanks for asking! Still searching for a job though


----------



## jstar (Apr 8, 2004)

Hi all!

Work is CRAZY...I will have to update you all later on that! I apologize for being MIA but I can't really play here while I am at work, only once in a while. I will def. catch up this weekend!

Fiber One - yep I luv it! My tummy doesn't bother me eating that much of it. ncgirl - too much fiber isn't bad for you but you are right if you eat too much of it you can get bloated and uncomfortable. Since I am used to eating lots of it, it doesn't bother me that much. Yrs ago I remember I started eating a lot of fiber - oat bran - and this happened to me!

Jodie - Yep I decided on the red velvet panne. Its sort of a rosy shade let me put up the link:www.bodytecfitness.com
the girl in the red 2 piece - that is exactly what I ordered. I hope it comes in time! Should be here next week. Talk about cutting it close, huh? 

Hey Stacey - the show is 4/24. I still have to come up with a theme for the sportswear round. I am thinking of doing a lifeguard costume but I need to find a lifeguard tee that doesn't totally cover me up. 

Yes I am getting excited! This weekend I promise I will try once again to post these stupid pics. I haven't had a chance yet but hopefully Payne's instructions will do the trick!

Greeky - yep I was hungry that day and ending up eating less the day after. I think we would all benefit if we just ate what we wanted in the amounts we wanted; your body will want more some days and less on others. As long as the food is clean, or mostly clean, it should work out. My pants are getting looser on me. wooo hoooo

My friends are taking me out this weekend to part-ay! They are so great; they know I need to let off some steam and forget about all the crap that has been going on in my life.


----------



## atherjen (Apr 8, 2004)

thelife guard idea sounds cool!! i like!!  

that suit is sexxyyy!  

Have a great weekend with your friends!


----------



## jstar (Apr 8, 2004)

Hey Jen!

I think the lifeguard idea is pretty original. Plus I can wear flip flops and not freaking high heels in that round!


----------



## atherjen (Apr 8, 2004)

I would DIE in heels!! Id Never be able to do figure! :ekk:

how have you been today?? busy busy? 
any plans for the long weekend?


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## JLB001 (Apr 8, 2004)

Cute suit!   It will look great on you!


----------



## jstar (Apr 9, 2004)

I just hope it gets here in time and that it fits!

Jen - you get used to the heels, I can't wear platforms at all, mine are 5 inch spikes with much needed ankle straps! (I never ever ever wear heels either)


----------



## jstar (Apr 9, 2004)

busy at work, yeah.

I WISH I had a long weekend! I wish I was at Fenway right now for opening day :sigh:

Tonight I am going to the gym after work for cardio and then will go out looking for the lifeguard get-up! I will need to update my journal later tonight and catch up on everyone elses!

Tomorrow I am meeting with a real estate agent at 9. I don't know why - or even if I am looking for a place anymore right now.
12-2 I have posing practice. And later that night - girlz night out! I wanna dance soo bad. I haven't been in forever!

Sunday - Its Easter, everything is closed, so nothing much doing on Sunday, except of course, another workout.


----------



## Fitgirl70 (Apr 9, 2004)

OH my gosh Jstar, that is an awesome suit girl....you're gonna look hot!

I love the lifeguard idea -- how cute.   I"m gonna remember that place when I get ready to order my suit in the fall.


----------



## jstar (Apr 11, 2004)

Happy Easter Everyone 

Update:

Diet - I keep track of my diet in a notebook so I don't always log it on here (although I am suppose to). So the past few days diet was going good, until last night. I caved and had mucho bread and 4 granola bars. I slept 12 hrs last night!!! I am mad at myself but todays a new day, and I do have more control than before, so I am glad about that.

Workouts:
I 've been doing total body workouts and hour-long cardio sessions this week, probably 4.

Personal Life - Miserable. Missing the jerk. I have had 2 dreams that we got back together... Last night my friend I was supposed to go out with bailed on me and another friend who was going out invited me along. I didn't want to go but I got all dressed up and did my hair and makeup then I called her and said I wasn't going. It sucks because I would be the only one not drinking, not just because of the upcoming show, but I don't drink anyways. I also didn't want to drive out there by myself, plus it was like 10 before she was "ready" and its probably like another 45 min drive to get to this place so I declined. I probably should've went tho then I wouldn't have binged. Man I look like shit today.

About the contest:
My application has been sent in and I decided to split a hotel room with another girl who is going. It won't be bad, like $50 each. Actually $33 because I think its 3 of us. My suit should be on its way this week, I HOPE!
Lets see, I am all set for tanning products and makeup. I may get some press on nails and a hair clip. I am going to attempt to use big hot rollers to get some big, bouncy curls in my hair. 
For my lifeguard costume I am wearing navy blue booty shorts and a bright orangy-red tankini top. I ironed on white letters to the front "GUARD" and then I went over the letters with silver sparkly fabric glue. It looks pretty cool. I really need to put a cross on there I think.  I found a bright orange whistle to wear around my neck, and I will get a small white towel to carry and wear sunglasses on my head. For shoes, Cathy suggested getting Sketchers with a chunky heel. To cut costs I am going to try to find something similar at Payless or Walmart this week. Linda suggested I put a line of white sunblock on my nose like the lifeguards do, I don't want to but she knows what the judges want so I will do it. Next Sat is the dress rehearsal where we come as if this was the real show. 

Posing Sessions: I went again yesterday and Linda says my lower body looked leaner than the week before That was of course til I binged last night  I really need to practice the T walk like a million more times.  

2 weeks out  - PLANS:

Well I am not in the greatest shape but I am sure I feel worse right now because of last night, before that my mood was more positive. I am holding so much water it is ridiculous! Starting today I am going to drink tons of water and eat only low sodium/no sodium foods. To keep things simple I divised a list of foods I can have this week:
oats
sweet potato
salad greens
99% lean ground turkey
turkey cutlets
chicken breast
natural duiretics:
kale
asparagus
broccoli

60 min cardio everyday this week
2-3 total body workouts

Final week:
Sun, Mon, Tues....deplete
eat NO carbs
low sodium
drink TONs of water
total body weight training everyday...try to drain every last ounce of glycogen out of your muscles
cardio - 60 min

Wed, Thurs, Fri....load
bring back carbs
still low sodium
no training or cardio
the water intake goes down everyday
start tanning...I am going to do 1-2 coats of spray on tan and then Dream Tan over that. 

Fri - Competitors meeting in CT @ 6 pm
We get our numbers and go over the opening number. Check into my hotel and get everything ready for the big day.


----------



## jstar (Apr 11, 2004)

Sun 4/10 - EASTER 

Woke up at noon! All the supermarkets are closed and I have no sodium free protein in the house! I had the protein powder with my oats...130mg per scoop. Do you think its ok for me to have this as my protein for today? I will go shopping tomorrow for chicken and turkey.

60 min elliptical

M1
3/4 cup oats
1 scoop protein
345  45.5C  24.5P  7F


----------



## JLB001 (Apr 11, 2004)

Chickie!  Don't stress the low sodium proteins.  Just use what you have until tomorrow.  You should be fine, just keep your water intake high to combat the sodium  If you have chicken, you can always boil it, which I hate, taste like  to me.

Your gonna do awesome!   Can't wait to see your Lifeguard outfit!  PICS!!!  now!    

I ordered my suit some the place you did.  But got plain ones.  Got small bottoms,  damn thing better fit.  LOL  I measured my purple suit before ordering and placed that on the order form.  PLease let me know if the quality of yours is good when you get it.


----------



## jstar (Apr 11, 2004)

Hey girl!

Oh, yeah let me try to dl those pics again...

Thanks for the advice, I will definitely let you know about the quality. I am due to get my suit on Tuesday. What color did you get? The lady there says the suits fit try to size. I ordered a med which is supposed to fit 8-10, I'll let you know if it does. I was too scared to get the smalls. Hopefully by my next show in August I will be a small!

Oh - about the chicken: do I really have to boil it you think? I really hate chicken without any condiments so I will most likely eat the xtra lean ground turkey and turkey cutlets...what is your opinion?


----------



## atherjen (Apr 11, 2004)

ughh boiled chicken!!  

I LOVE the Lifeguard suit!! soo creative!!!  when do we get pics?!?!?!?! PLZZZZZZZZZZZZZ  

sounds like you have everything together!! you must be getting excited!! and dont let one night of a lil mess up get you down. SMILE for me girl!  todays a new day and so isnt tomarrow. all that water retention will go away! no worries! Your gonna kick butt!! 
60mins cardio?  have a blast with that! hehe 

you know, I dont drink either and it makes it soooooooo hard with all my friends going out.  

Happy Easter girl!!


----------



## JLB001 (Apr 11, 2004)

I didn't boil mine the lasttime.  Just tastes like cardboard to me.  Just be sure you get fresh chicken, not frozen (they add sodium stuff to the frozen).  Get the stuff that is not injected with that solution.  

You could use a skillet and Mrs. Dash to season.  Shouldn't have sodium in the Mrs. Dash.

I did opposite of you the last time I did a show.  I had to add salts to my foods up until Wed.  then cut it out.  When we did cut it, I continued to use my pam and cook my meats in a skillet with Mrs. Dash. (steak does not taste the same with Mrs. Dash).  What conidments will you be using?


----------



## greekblondechic (Apr 11, 2004)

I'm w jodie and jenjen I wanna see pics!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


----------



## jstar (Apr 11, 2004)

Hi Jen - 

I tried Payne's suggestion but it didn't work. Easyshare doesn't allow you to take pics from it and save em to your hard drive. I will have to go to Walmart and ask them to give me prints and burn me a CD. Then I can save it to my hard drive and paste it in here. Ya know I think I will just delete these pics and take new ones of me in my suit and in the sportswear - later this week. I promise I will post them up, thank you for your patience everyone!

Jodie - I will use Mrs Dash garlic and xtra spicy...thanks for the tips, I can get fresh turkey breast cutlets and ground turkey, no problem.  The only reason I am cutting sodium now is because I never paid attention to the sodium before because when I do it leaves me with nothing to eat. Not to mention I have been drinking hardly any water and lots of diet soda. I think I NEED to cut back now. I can see it in my clothes, holding lots of water around the middle~ 

Oooh, I never knew they injected the frozen stuff. Yuck!


----------



## JLB001 (Apr 11, 2004)

Oh...don't talk about diet sodas.  I've been having way too many of those too.  My new addiction is diet sprite.  and sugarless kool aid


----------



## atherjen (Apr 11, 2004)

back away from the diet pops ladies!!!  

Ok Star I can wait! just for you!!!  sounds complicated to get em on your computer! what a rip!! the new ones will be better anyways in your new suit!!!


----------



## Paynne (Apr 11, 2004)

> _*Originally posted by jstar *_
> 
> 
> I tried Payne's suggestion but it didn't work.



 Oh well.  It's the puter geek in me that gets frustrated when others can't get stuff to work.


----------



## jstar (Apr 12, 2004)

It's not your fault Paynne, it's this stupid Kodak Easyshare. I think they set it up that way so you HAVE to go to the photomart and pay for a CD to burn, I don't have a burner so what can I do?

Yesterday's Meals:

All I ate was protein powder and oats cuz I needed to go shopping and I had nothing else that qualified as "low sodium"

M1
3/4 cup oats
1 scoop protein

M2, M3, M4:
1/2 cup oats
1 scoop protein

1155 141.5C  90.5P  29.5F

plus tons of water and crystal light OJ

60 min elliptical

Today:
Far less bloated; I think by the end of the week I will be alright with the bloating. I went to the supermarket on my lunch break and picked up some extra lean ground turkey, fresh asparagus and sweet potatoes. The cashier overcharged me for the ground turkey and then when I pointed it out to him he had to take it off my total so I got it for free!!! Yippeeeee!!!!

Later on I will do more cardio and probably some lower body before that and abs.

Tommorow there is another posing session which I really should go to but I don't know yet if I will~ I'd rather do my workout instead and then pose by myself so I can concentrate w/o all the distractions.


----------



## atherjen (Apr 12, 2004)

free turkey!!  Nice guy!! 

my goodness-I think I would have died yestarday eating just oats and whey! lol need to bump that food up today chickie!


----------



## Jill (Apr 12, 2004)

All that whey sould have made me sick! I have a weak tummy!

Oh ya, I got free turkey breast, but it was from Granny's bird yesterday! She just insisted I take leftovers-I took atleast 10oz of turkey breast!


----------



## Stacey (Apr 12, 2004)

Hey girl!! I like the lifeguard Idea..-- I Bet that looks SOOO AWESOME!! Very Creative!

I'm Getting sooo excited for you!! Your going to do great!!!

Sounds like you have everything together! keep up the great work girl!!!


----------



## jstar (Apr 13, 2004)

Nice new Avi AJ!

I luv oats and whey

My diet is going to be incredibly boring the next couple weeks just warning ya....

Hey Stace! Thanks girl  I am excited and getting antsy...still no suit. It should come today, we'll see!


----------



## ncgirl21 (Apr 13, 2004)

Your gonna rock hun!!  

How many competitions have you done?


----------



## atherjen (Apr 13, 2004)

Thanks girl! needed something after Easter. 
were you mixing the oats and whey together??? 

boring? nanh as long as you like what you eat it dont matter to anyone else.


----------



## JLB001 (Apr 13, 2004)

Jstar...I think we have very similar boring diets.


----------



## jstar (Apr 13, 2004)

Thanks ncgirl! I have only done one - last Oct. This will be #2 and hopefully I will do a couple more this year. It is really awesome, trying to improve yourself each and everytime, trying to see just how much harder you can push yourself. I love it!

Jen - Yup I mix em together! I never get tired of that meal either What's your favorite meal?

Jodie - I should've done this a while ago, it keeps things simple when you have SO much other junk to worry about!

***I guess I am not going to posing tonight. Hey it saves me $20 plus I have to get my workout in and COOK AGAIN! I have no place to practice in my heels except my cellar. (Unless I go to the mall or supermarket in them!....Hey I need a nice tile floor to practice on.


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## Jill (Apr 13, 2004)

I mix my protein and oaties together too!


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## JLB001 (Apr 13, 2004)

I like my diets simple!  I don't like having alot to choose from.  I ahte when its all over and I can have whatever, makes me have to think what to have for lunch..ya know, pizza, chick-fil-a, wendy's.......

Go to the mall in those shoes.....LOL   j/k


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## Jill (Apr 13, 2004)

I was thinking the same thing about the shoes Jodie!


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## JLB001 (Apr 13, 2004)

Jstar....just don't wear a short short skirt and a itty bitty top if you go to the mall with them.


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## jstar (Apr 13, 2004)

too funny Jodie! Can you imagine??? 
I think I might try the raquetball court at my gym since no one is hardly ever in there.

My seamstress just emailed me about my suit. Its being shipping priority tomorrow so I should have it by Saturday. One week out - yikes!


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## Stacey (Apr 13, 2004)

Oh my that would be a funny Site!!!  I wish I could go to your show Jstar- I know your gonna rock the house!!!


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## ncgirl21 (Apr 13, 2004)

How do you do one leg SL DL?


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## atherjen (Apr 13, 2004)

go practice strutting in the mall! I like that idea!!  you just neveer know......  

how are you feeling StaryStar?? excited? nervous??? Im EXCITED for you!!!  

Andrea- you balance your other leg on a bench behind you for the 1leg SL deads. their a good twist to the regular


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## greekblondechic (Apr 13, 2004)

If you wear jeans hardly anyone will know you're wearin hooker heels!!!!


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## jstar (Apr 14, 2004)

bawww Greeky! Good idea! They might look at me weird if I keep doing my bitch walk and striking poses Who cares though right?

One leg DL ---oh boy no wonder I can do no more than like 5 at a time! I wasn't using anything to balance the other leg. Hmm I might try that. One of the fitness girls showed me this exercise and it requires a lot of balance (which I have little of). 

She puts one leg slightly in front and as she bends forward at the waist she raises the back leg straight out. If you can't get the form down to start try doing them keeping the back leg down or raising it up slightly. As you gain more and more balance you can raise your back leg higher and higher. (I hope that makes sense!)

Yes Jen I am excited. I really feel in the right frame of mind over the past few weeks. After this comp I am gonna concentrate on gaining LBM and maintaining low bodyfat...I DO NOT plan to binge or "bulk" (same thing to me )


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## jstar (Apr 14, 2004)

Meals and Workouts - Update:

4/12 MON

M1
3/4 cup oats
1 scoop protein
345  45.5C  24.5P  8.5F

M2
1/2 cup oats
1 scoop protein
270  32C  22P  7F

M3
1/2 cup oats
1 scoop protein
270  32C  22P  7F

M4
4 oz sweet potato
3 oz cooked ground turkey xtra lean
3 asparagus sticks (1st time eating this)
264  31.5C  32P  1F

M5
4 oz sweet potato
4 oz cooked ground turkey xtra lean
asparagus
264  31.5C  32P  1F

M6
1 TBL PB
95  2C 4P  8F

1508  174.5C  136.5P  32.5F

1 hr elliptical

************************************************

4/13 TUES

M1
3/4 cup oats
1 scoop protein
345  45.5C  24.5P  8.5F

M2
6 oz sweet potato
4 oz cooked ground turkey xtra lean
290  36C  34P  1F

M3
1/2 cup oats
1 scoop protein
270  32C  22P  7F

M4
4 oz deli turkey  
2 cups Fiber One
390  96C  41P  6F

M5
2 cups Fiber One
240  96C  8P  4F

1535  305.5C  129.5P  26.5F

Rest Day 

************************************************

Comments:

I am definitely getting leaner although I wish I was at the point I am at now at 6 weeks out I am happy with myself for being strong, and I feel more confident than last fall. I guess that is because I know what to expect and I could care less about how I place. I know that I am on the right path and that by the fall, my physique will be more muscular, leaner and overall better. I know this because I am dedicated to making it happen and no one can stop me


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## atherjen (Apr 14, 2004)

LOVE your attitude woman! on fire!!!  
soo glad to hear your leaning right down!! cant wait for the comp for you!! and pics!!  

did u go practice strutting n posing somewhere?


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## jstar (Apr 14, 2004)

No I didn't practice but I will tonight!

Yeah getting dumped does wonders for your attitude! I guess I took all the hurt and anger I have inside of me and decided to put it to good use

How are you Jen Jen?

Oh, I totally forgot my old co-workers planned a dinner tonight. I had thought they postponed it because one of them wasn't able to make it but noooooo! I really don't want to go, ya know, I need to get to the gym plus I can't eat anything so I am just gonna not reply to their emails. I feel so badabout lying


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## Stacey (Apr 14, 2004)

LOVE The additude girl!!!! You Rock!!!

Jstar--just make it up to them later!! (Your Coworkers)
I owe mine a LOT of lunches & happy hours b/c I never go with them. LoL

Omg that single led SLDL sounds like I would Fall on my bootie..LMAO!! I'm trying it tonight..hmmm? Or Maybe now in the bathroom..haha


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## jstar (Apr 15, 2004)

4/14 WED

M1
3/4 cup oats
1 scoop protein

M2
1/2 cup oats
1 scoop protein

M3
1/2 cup oats
1 scoop protein

*forgot to cook 

M4
2.5 cups Fiber One
1/2 cup ew

*everytime I am hungry I eat this stuff now and it fills me right up!

Workout:
Total Body:3 sets of 12 for each
Bench Press
Heavy Lunges
Bent DB Rows
DB SLDL 
Shoulder Press
DB Shoulder Presses

A few sets of:
Upright Rows
DB Curls
Rope Pressdowns
Crunches

45 elliptical

10 min walking in my heels in the raquetball court!
Jeez I wish I wasn't so self conscious, the echo in that room is so loud and being in there with my heels on I sounded like a horse I will go back Friday night for more - when it is quiet and no one is around!

M5
1.5 cups Fiber One
1 slice ff cheese
1/2 serv almonds
1 oz cooked ground turkey xtra lean

M6
1/4 cup oats
1/4 scoop protein

came out to about 1700 cals...will post the exact breakdown later. I am at work and don't have my notebook in front of me.


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## ncgirl21 (Apr 15, 2004)

Your doing great sweetie!!    Can't wait to see those pictures !

You love that fiber one don't you?    When I eat too much my belly sticks out like I'm pregnant, I guess I just need to up it slowly.  I'm having some with my protein shake after my workout at lunch though!!  

How tall are the heels you walking in?


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## jstar (Apr 15, 2004)

I do luv Fiber One! But I think I will chill with all the fiber until after my show - don't want to risk bloating!...NC - just work up to that amount of fiber. Shoot Fiber One has 14g of fiber per .5 cups! 

The heels are 5 inches. The hardest part is when you have to walk from one corner of the stage to the other but you have to face yourself towards the judges as you do it...I look like I am drunk, all stumbling when I do that!


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## jstar (Apr 15, 2004)

Oh I luv your avi BTW!


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## JLB001 (Apr 15, 2004)

Fiber will also help ya lean out a lil too.  But not sure if the cereal has the same effect as the kind ya mix with water.

Did your suit make it yet??


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## Jill (Apr 15, 2004)

What do you eat your turkey with? How do you cook it? 

BTW you are doing awesome chickie!!!! Keep it up!


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## atherjen (Apr 15, 2004)

dang u sure like ur Fiber 1 and oats  

your workouts and everything look super! I cant wait for you!!!


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## jstar (Apr 15, 2004)

No suit yet Jodie...should be here Sat!

Thanks everyone!!!

Jillie - I eat ground turkey plain or w/Mrs Dash. If I was allowed I'd have ketchup though


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## jstar (Apr 17, 2004)

I am not competing next weekend. Shit happens...look for a new journal by me reallly soon!


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## JLB001 (Apr 17, 2004)

I hope your ok?????


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## jstar (Apr 17, 2004)

Hey Jodie - yeah I am okay!

I have just been in a major slump the past few days. Getting over the jerk is proving to be VERY difficult. Needless to say I reverted back to old behaviors and binged myself silly the past few days. There is just no possible way I can get up there on stage with this frame of mind plus I feel like I look like crap. This sucks. 

I don't intend to sit here and wallow in my pity anymore. Starting tomorrow I will start a new journal and get right back on track. 

I got my suit today and I love it, its actually comfy I would say the quality is there Jodie...but I don't know if I like the huge rhinestones they put on it. The fabric seems kinda thick but I think the cut and style will flatter me best when I get into contest shape. 

I weighed myself today for the hell of it. I am at 141.5 and tanita says 27% (I know that % means shit though). My waist was at 29.5 and hips at 39.5! Ugh. I will do my official measurements tomorrow and take pics and finally post em. At least I can take them in my suit and watch myself get leaner as the weeks go on. 

Right now I am just trying to figure out the right diet and training plan to get on and focus on the the next few weeks. I really want to lean down for the summer and get a head start on my physique for August (next comp).  I just got back from the mall with my friend and it's so hard..with so many cute clothes out there and me being single again I just wanna look good again ya know? I am lucky if I do fit in a 9. 

I am thinking about trying this program starting tomorrow:
http://www.bodymusclejournal.com/vol05/fitfigures.html


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## JLB001 (Apr 17, 2004)

Following a Beverly plan is usually a solid one with good results!

Take the time you need to figure things out for yourself!  Being single has lots of doors that can be opened and endless possibilites!  Use it to your advantage!

They didn't put little stones on the suit?  Mine all have 30ss swaroski stones.  I have a place that you can order those from along with the backs if you want to change them out.  Did they glue them on?  Or are they through the back of the fabric with prongs holding them in place?

damn it Chickie!!!  You should have called me!   I wanted to eat bad stuff too!


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## atherjen (Apr 17, 2004)

ah girl I am so sorry to hear that things havent been going well. Take all the time that you need to get everything back in line for yourself- theres soo much time for you to compete and different comps-tons of time!  gotta take care of #1 <-YOU first!  emotionally and phyiscally. Although Im sure that you look great! Dont forget that were always here for you! If you ever need to talk let me know! I have a couple funny looking ears! 

save that suit though hun- something to motivate you even more and wear when you are ready. 

that plan sounds like a good one-something to follow that would maybe help keep you focused! 
Cheer up sunshine!


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## jstar (Apr 17, 2004)

Thanks Jodie and Jen!

The rhinestones are through the fabric with prongs. I don't think little crystals would stick on with glue Jodie. I have plenty of time though to tweak that suit and spruce it up some. It needs something on the back of the bottoms. 

F- I am just an ANGRY fire-breathing bitch lately!!! I have so much pent up anger at wasting 4.5 yrs of my life with him thinking about future plans....just to have it all blow up in my face. But you girls are right, I need to look out for myself now and take care of me. I need to raise my standards and find someone who will love and appreciate me unconditionally. This is ridiculous! 

Ok - so that Bev plan looks ok to you guys? I want to follow the training and cardio but that diet...I dunno. I might die on that plan! I need to drop about 5-10 lbs of pure fat. I was thinking of tweaking it one of the following ways:

Option A: Follow the plan as laid out for 2-3 weeks to drop some quick lbs and water weight...then throw in periodic cheats a la Jodie-style.  

Option B: Follow the workouts and cardio as laid out and come up with a better diet...or add food (carbs) to the one they have in the article.

Any thoughts?


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## JLB001 (Apr 17, 2004)

> _*Originally posted by jstar *_
> Thanks Jodie and Jen!
> 
> The rhinestones are through the fabric with prongs. I don't think little crystals would stick on with glue Jodie. I have plenty of time though to tweak that suit and spruce it up some. It needs something on the back of the bottoms. *Some suit makers use glue to glue the stones on, wasn't sure if she did as well.  *
> ...


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## greekblondechic (Apr 17, 2004)

Aww, sorry you are not feeling so great sweetie but just focus on making yourself feel good and don't worry!


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## jstar (Apr 17, 2004)

thanks greekie 

I will start a new journal tomorrow...

I just found some old precomp stuff from last year when I went to see Linda before the comp (at 9 weeks out). She had me on a calorie cycle of 1730,1830,1930 and 40/40/20 split. My cardio was 5x30 with 2-3 HIT sessions. I increased it to 45 minutes at 1 month out. Weights were total body 3 times a week with 12-15 reps per set. I may just do this again....or blend the Bev workout to this diet. I will post up what I decide tomorrow.  I am going food shopping in the morning.


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## JLB001 (Apr 17, 2004)

mmm.....food.


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## jstar (Apr 17, 2004)

are you hungry Jodie?

I will throw in a box of donuts in my cart just for you


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## atherjen (Apr 17, 2004)

I like option B too!  that cycle that your Trainer had you on last year doesnt sound too bad.. and it worked to eh? 
is it something you are able to stick with? a 40/40/20 split seems very reasonable?!


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## jstar (Apr 18, 2004)

Yes Jen, it wasn't hard to stick with at all because she let me eat any clean foods I wanted, as long as it added up to the right # of calories and macros. 

I am off to the supermarket. When I get back I will post up my new journal and stats.


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