# Why do girls like assholes and standoff'ish guys better than funnay and outgoing boy?



## minimal (Jul 2, 2011)

Discusss.


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## theCaptn' (Jul 2, 2011)

minimal said:


> Discusss.



They don't you are wrong


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## Gissurjon (Jul 3, 2011)

They need something to fix

Eventually those females give up but by that time all the good guys are off the market. Then they bitch about how all men are assholes.


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## M4A3 (Jul 3, 2011)

In my experience, 90% of the time it all comes back to Daddy issues. Seems the majority of women want to date a guy like Daddy, or get Daddy's attention by pissing him off. 

A lot of women have Fathers that are either assholes, or, they believe dating an asshole will piss daddy off.

In addition, part of it, I'm sure, is a lot of guys who are nice and considerate come off as pussies. Women want to date men. Not a throw towel.


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## Little Wing (Jul 3, 2011)

theCaptn' said:


> They don't you are wrong



this


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## theCaptn' (Jul 3, 2011)

So being polite, considerate and respectful is not masculine?


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## Little Wing (Jul 3, 2011)

i think bio chem is one of the best men on IM and i don't think he ever would be a standoffish asshole to a woman. it takes a lot more manliness to be a good guy than it does to be an asshole.


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## SFW (Jul 3, 2011)

^ you act like you can read people on the internet. No one knows anyone. Let alone an internet persona you interact with from time to time.

My advice to any younger cats is, change for no bitch. If youre a moody prick, dont turn into an upbeat douchebag just to sync with her. Theres only so long you'll keep that up and the contrast back to assholishness will be stark and alarming to her. I know its cliche but be yourself. And to discuss....the guy becomes the asshole as the relationship progresses. Shes already attached at that point and doesnt want to "break up", so the shitty attitude on his side persists and worsens.


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## Little Wing (Jul 3, 2011)

SFW said:


> ^ you act like you can read people on the internet.



if someone has talked about their values etc and been consistent for years you can get a very solid idea who they are even online. there are a few people on here i do not think would be much different to talk to in person and yes i've met imers in real life and they have been who i thought they were from our online discussions. it's the internet not fairy tales r us. some people are sincere online.


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## SFW (Jul 3, 2011)

Youre either naive or arrogant to believe that you can know people online. Good judge of character vs. Imaginary perceptions of someone = two diff things


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## Little Wing (Jul 3, 2011)

SFW said:


> Youre either naive or arrogant to believe that you can know people online. Good judge of character vs. Imaginary perceptions of someone = two diff things



um as i said i have met people after getting to know them online and was not much surprised. the only thing way unexpected was the voice. i do know people though who have really been fucked over thinking they knew people who were creating a fake persona online. need to use your head and keep in mind till you meet a person _could_ be fos. sometimes they aren't though. i'd be willing to bet you biochem is who he says he is. he's not some moral less asshole masquerading online as a man who cares whether he really is a good man or a bad one. i've not met him in person but i bet he's a good guy.


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## Gissurjon (Jul 3, 2011)

SFW said:


> My advice to any younger cats is, change for no bitch. If youre a moody prick, dont turn into an upbeat douchebag just to sync with her.



That's terrible advice. Here is a better one, stop being an asshole and work on some real character that doesn't derive from insecurity and lack of self-worth.


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## ecot3c inside (Jul 3, 2011)

you forgot good looks.. think about it. Nice guy, ugly? or asshole/standoffish, good looking? 

There are plenty of factors that are not mentioned, but you are wrong..


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## red rocket (Jul 4, 2011)

In years gone past I tested this theory.  Honestly. Just to see what the facts were.  I started dating a girl, treated her like fucking gold.  Held her up on a pedistal and she walked all over me.  It got bad and in the end I couldnt believe I let myself secum to that.  

I dated some others who I acted like they didnt matter.  I did what I want and did it when I wanted.  If I showed her some attention she just ate it up.  If I included her in something I was doing, well fuck I was the king. In the end of those ones, I couldnt believe aa girl would let some one run over her like that.  It actually repulsed me.

Fast forward to the wife, well we're married and I will leave it like that, LOL.


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## minimal (Jul 4, 2011)

red rocket said:


> Fast forward to the wife, well we're married and I will leave it like that, LOL.




so how are you with your wife?  are you more like a nice guy or more like a king?


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## red rocket (Jul 4, 2011)

Well started out as the nice guy, got walked all over.  Went throught the bullshit of the shift in power. 

Now its kinda a give and take, I give she takes, lol.

Nah, its work on both ends all the time.


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## KelJu (Jul 5, 2011)

SFW said:


> Youre either naive or arrogant to believe that you can know people online. Good judge of character vs. Imaginary perceptions of someone = two diff things




What are you talking about? It is arrogant and naive to believe you can know anyone. Most people can't even muster the courage to get to know themselves.

I agree with LW that when someone has been consistent on their core beliefs and ideas for well over 8 years now on line that you could make an assumption about that person and probably be in the same ball park as making an assumption about a friend in your real life. 

The heart of IM consist of a community of people who have known each other for a very long time. The rest of the 20 to 30 other regular posters consist of corndog shitheads who pretend to be Johnny big dick football hero and 70ish IQ lunatics who think IM is their own personal political blog.


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## Arnold (Jul 5, 2011)

SFW said:


> You're either naive or arrogant to believe that you can know people online. Good judge of character vs. Imaginary perceptions of someone = two diff things



I disagree with that.


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## troubador (Jul 5, 2011)

> Why do girls like assholes and standoff'ish guys better than funnay and outgoing boy?



I think that's a false dichotomy. Funny outgoing guys can be real assholes and standoffish toward certain people.


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## dointhemost (Jul 6, 2011)

I suppose it comes down to how much self esteem they have. And how young they are. When I was younger I was so into the challenge but as I grew up and matured it is not about the challenge it is about the connection.

I love guys who make me laugh. I hate ASSHOLES


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## LightBearer (Jul 6, 2011)

its the assholes who are the outgoing ones


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## meatead (Jul 6, 2011)

A woman told me once that she goes after those sort of guys (rsoles) so she can try & " conquer them with her love"!!!!blurghhhhh


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## awhites1 (Jul 7, 2011)

theCaptn' said:


> They don't you are wrong



+1

some go after that but the majority of girls i think go after "normal" guys. I also think guys that feel that women only go after a-holes are too nice and too giving (and yes there is such a thing) and have low self esteem that is noticible and therefore a turn off.

_no one wants to be treated like sht_


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## Gena Marie (Jul 7, 2011)

I would pick funny over asshole any day.  We do like nice guys, but we don't like guys that will let us walk all over them either.  Wooped!  There has to be a happy medium.  I think that goes for both sexes.


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## Arnold (Jul 7, 2011)

Gena Marie said:


> I would pick funny over asshole any day.  We do like nice guys, but we don't like guys that will let us walk all over them either.  Wooped!  There has to be a happy medium.  I think that goes for both sexes.



that must mean that I am a funny guy!


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## Gena Marie (Jul 7, 2011)

Yes baby, you are very funny, and very rarely an asshole, well to me anyway


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## awhites1 (Jul 7, 2011)

Prince said:


> that must mean that I am a funny guy!



Yes baby, you are very funny, and very rarely an asshole, well to me anyway


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## BigMuffin (Jul 17, 2011)

Funny guys almost always get laid more then ass holes. I have a ugly ass cousin who is shit in your pants on the spot funny and he get laid by good 8/10 often. Nice guys do usually finish last so if your a nice guy reading this good luck.


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## TJTJ (Jul 17, 2011)

I think its neither. It how fat your wallet is. My exwife told me she would want to get back together if I started making more money. She fukin told me that! w/e bitch keep step'n


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## theCaptn' (Jul 17, 2011)

TJTJ said:


> I think its neither. It how fat your wallet is. My exwife told me she would want to get back together if I started making more money. She fukin told me that! w/e bitch keep step'n


 
you should have started pimpin' that ho


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## KelJu (Jul 17, 2011)

TJTJ said:


> I think its neither. It how fat your wallet is. My exwife told me she would want to get back together if I started making more money. She fukin told me that! w/e bitch keep step'n



What is wrong with that? She is being honest, when most women are lying to your face. She may be a bitch for other reasons, but I actually think her honesty is a good quality. 

My best friend once told a girl who had been pursuing him heavily that if she lost 30lbs, he would go out with her. Sounds like a dickheadish thing to do, but she showed up a few months later 30 pounds lighter. They ended up having a decent relationship for a year or so.


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## HialeahChico305 (Jul 17, 2011)

KelJu said:


> What is wrong with that? She is being honest, when most women are lying to your face. She may be a bitch for other reasons, but I actually think her honesty is a good quality.
> 
> *My best friend once told a girl who had been pursuing him heavily that if she lost 30lbs, he would go out with her. Sounds like a dickheadish thing to do, but she showed up a few months later 30 pounds lighter. They ended up having a decent relationship for a year or so*.



waaaaaaaaaa. That girl right there is a keeper!!!!!!  tell this to your regular everyday chick and they go all suicidal and butthurt. True story


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## KelJu (Jul 17, 2011)

HialeahChico305 said:


> waaaaaaaaaa. That girl right there is a keeper!!!!!!  tell this to your regular everyday chick and they go all suicidal and butthurt. True story





She was actually a really cool chick, too. You would think the type of girl who would do that had no self respect, but she was just a realist. She saw him, she wanted him, she did what it took to get him. She was well aware that he was a 9/10 and she was a 5/10. Losing the weight didn't really make her look all that much better, but my buddy thought that any chick who would do that for a dude is worth giving a shot.


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## eng (Jul 18, 2011)

women are a piss off


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## KelJu (Jul 18, 2011)

eng said:


> women are a piss off



Speak Engrish?


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## HialeahChico305 (Jul 18, 2011)

eng said:


> women are a piss off


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## Bigb21084 (Jul 20, 2011)

Your picking up the wrong whores... Shoot for the older ones.


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## jtterrible (Jul 21, 2011)

the really sad part of that post is that most normal guys wouldn't alter their physique if they were given the same option with a hot girl...


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## HialeahChico305 (Jul 21, 2011)

jtterrible said:


> the really sad part of that post is that most normal guys wouldn't alter their physique if they were given the same option with a hot girl...



That's because we know the female species is unpredictable. its a day to day thang with them


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## KelJu (Jul 21, 2011)

jtterrible said:


> the really sad part of that post is that most normal guys wouldn't alter their physique if they were given the same option with a hot girl...



I disagree, sort of. Think of it like this, a guy wouldn't change their physique, because a guy probably already has. Men are proactive when it comes to getting pussy. We have to be. We have made the money and put in the hours in the gym in order to make ourselves marketable. I decent looking chick doesn't have to do anything to get get dick. They might have to do some things that disagree with their sensibilities, but ultimately they have a nice selection of dick just for being decent looking. 

A dude, on the other hand, has to look decent, have a good personality, and make plenty of money, and be accepting the the right social circles. The reason is obvious. Dick is worth dick where as pussy is the most valuable commodity on the planet.


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## VikingWarlord (Jul 25, 2011)

It's not about assholes and it doesn't have to do with women wanting projects. It's about strength of character.

"Nice" guys are usually weak. They're bending over backwards to give the girls whatever they think they want, being spineless cowards. This is a horrible way to go, as all it does is get you chewed up and spit out. Men that people call "assholes" know who they are, what they want, and they go get it. They don't bend, they make people earn everything they get. This is important.

It's entirely possible to be a nice guy while maintaining strength of character. SFW is partially right, though his delivery is comical. It's about figuring out what you'll stand for, not being a coward, and sticking to your convictions while still being fair. Your time and respect are commodities and, as such, people should have to earn them. If you don't have to work for something, it's not worth much. If you're easily controlled, you're not interesting.

Success with women is easy. Be fun, be interesting, be something different. Have something better to do than meeting women.

As an aside, women are the worst sources of information on dating women. Seriously.


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## Gentleman (Jul 25, 2011)

BAD BOYS RULE .. ALWAYS!!


A club I've enjoyed being apart of since I was 14.


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## Zaphod (Jul 25, 2011)

Gentleman said:


> BAD BOYS RULE .. ALWAYS!!
> 
> 
> A club I've enjoyed being apart of since I was 14.



About three weeks you've been a member then?


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## jtterrible (Jul 25, 2011)

Zaphod said:


> About three weeks you've been a member then?



Ownd


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## Calves of Steel (Jul 25, 2011)

it's all about not looking nervous and not letting her know she can affect the way you feel. I've never had success with a girl who knew she could ruin my day. I had to change big time in college and stop being a pussy to get girls to treat me right long term. If you act like a nice guy but rarely go out of your way and be very clear that there will be no receiving of bullshit, then the occasional going out of your way counts 100X times as much. People don't just find a perfect person for them that accepts them 100%, you gotta change a little to be a winner. It'll be better for your girl too, spoiling her can fuck her up for a long time


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## buddhaluv (Jul 26, 2011)

well it's obvious. woman like men that are confident & in control. & assholes carry those traits. that it why woman love them


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## JeepKuntry (Jul 26, 2011)

Women like assholes because they see it as a challenge.  Really to see if they can change them.  This is true in alot of younger women!


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## Gentleman (Jul 26, 2011)

JeepKuntry said:


> Women like assholes because they see it as a challenge. Really to see if they can change them. This is true in alot of younger women!


 
I doubt women want to change a guy who can effectively protect them.


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## Zaphod (Jul 26, 2011)

Gentleman said:


> I doubt women want to change a guy who can effectively protect them.



That's why they want to change you?  You can't even protect yourself from the beast known as your mom and her cottage cheese thighs.


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## fufu (Jul 28, 2011)

VikingWarlord said:


> It's not about assholes and it doesn't have to do with women wanting projects. It's about strength of character.
> 
> "Nice" guys are usually weak. They're bending over backwards to give the girls whatever they think they want, being spineless cowards. This is a horrible way to go, as all it does is get you chewed up and spit out. Men that people call "assholes" know who they are, what they want, and they go get it. They don't bend, they make people earn everything they get. This is important.
> 
> ...



 Not exactly as I would phrase it, but excellent post.


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## castlehill (Aug 21, 2011)

You can't be too nice or you will be walked over, no chick want to be worshiped to the point that you act like a puss.  I had a girl do it to me once and it freaked me out, the more she stared at me the more I wanted to run like hell.  You need to be strong enough to have your own opinions when your with her after all she wants a man not a boy.

On the other side, I asked a friend of mine why she went out with so many assholes and not nice guys and she said "they were the only ones that asked her out"

I can remember from my youthful asshole stage that I did have more dates but I also asked everything with a tight ass out.  Now that I am divorced and more selective I do wuss out more when it comes to asking girls out but I don't give in on the tight ass part.


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## OMEGAx (Aug 23, 2011)

you cant play games or try to be something you are not

both genders pick up of the farce if you display it

best advice is be YOU


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## jtterrible (Aug 24, 2011)

OMEGAx said:


> you cant play games or try to be something you are not
> 
> both genders pick up of the farce if you display it
> 
> best advice is be YOU



Unless of course you are really lame and stupid.. Then idk your pretty much shit out of luck..


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## OMEGAx (Aug 24, 2011)

thats right

but being false like that pick up artist show is even worse lol


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## mario_ps2 (Sep 20, 2011)

minimal said:


> Discusss.



Because they make them come and squirt..


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## returnofthdragon (Sep 20, 2011)

mario_ps2 said:


> Because they make them come and squirt..



Lol


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## OTG85 (Sep 20, 2011)

Some women do love abuse.I feel sorry for them.


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## IronAddict (Sep 20, 2011)

Prince said:


> that must mean that I am a funny guy!



Prince, just because you're funny looking, doesn't mean you're funny.

J/k

Women are funny. If they use that criteria to judge you, then fuck em. They don't really know their asshole from there elbow. When push comes to shove, all they really look at is your wallet!


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## JoeClyde (Sep 23, 2011)

In my experience.  Women have no clue what they want.  Even less.  They never want the same thing from year to year or month to month.

Most women are followers.  They seek out men with perceived value.  If a lot of women like Steve Buschemi.  Then a woman will find him attractive.  If she is dating a guy that she hates, and one of her girlfriends is checking him out.  She will stay with the guy because he has value.  

Value to women is the ultimate Axe Body Spray


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## Pahlevan (Nov 2, 2011)

That sucks.


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## troubador (Nov 2, 2011)

JoeClyde said:


> In my experience.  Women have no clue what they want.  Even less.  They never want the same thing from year to year or month to month.
> 
> Most women are followers.  They seek out men with perceived value.  If a lot of women like Steve Buschemi.  Then a woman will find him attractive.  If she is dating a guy that she hates, and one of her girlfriends is checking him out.  She will stay with the guy because he has value.
> 
> Value to women is the ultimate Axe Body Spray



This is true but any reason anybody is attracted to anybody is that they perceive some value about them in whole or part.


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## GoodManners (Nov 4, 2011)

KelJu said:


> . Dick is worth dick where as pussy is the most valuable commodity on the planet.


 
You give them that value, that worth, by thinking that way.  Be secure in who you are - value yourself first. Then - as VikingWarlord says - make it something that you don't just give away. people should earn it.

That alone makes you appealing to the opposite sex.

Be a blend of the alpha and the beta male when needed.


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## jkelley69 (Nov 6, 2011)

I just got dumped after 8 years and i will say there is such a thing as being to nice.I treated her like a fucking queen for years and when ever she didnt get her way she would pout and i sometimes felt like she would leave me if she didnt get her way so she always got her way there is much more to this story if you want to see i have a thread in open chat (i need help) so like 6 or7 months ago she was going to leave me she thought i was being mean and treating her bad cus she gaine a bunch of weight after she had our son.i would try to help her by giveing advice cus she wanted to loose some weight I wanted her to loose some but only cus some of her family has weight issues and many health problems because of it but she never dedicated herself to it and took any advice or critacisme as being mean.The only thing ive ever asked from her was to be responsibile with money and help out more I never gave a shit about her weight gain as far as looks go she was still the most beutiful thing in the world to me for three days i begged her to try it again that we could work it out.After that i was so fucking scared of loosing her i let her do what ever she wanted spend what ever i did complain about it but was just a pushover it wasnt so bad for about 3 months all i wanted was for her to show me in any way she still loved me and cared for me and it just didnt happen i lost 25 pounds the rest of the summer cus i was so depressed and in the en she left.She also tried saying i would use her for sex cus she would always want to buy shit when we couldnt afford it or do stuff where i wouldnt get to spend time with her so i would say well what do i get wich is what she use to do to me all the time,say well if you buy me this i will do this alot of times she never held up her end of the bargin and i would be bummed but she always thought i was mad.I told her many times sex isnt just sex to me it is an emotion it makes me feel loved and cared about all worries go away at least for the time being and the more sex we had the better i felt about things always cared more about pleasing her than me pleasing her pleased me.In the end i got screwed 3 weeks after she left me she was seeing a guy she talked about for months while we were still together.F**K ME.Its going on a month and a half im still misrable.I am 33 i dont want to start over  i wish she would say WTF im i doing and come back but im sure she wont at least the kids still love me.You know how the saying goes wish in one hand and shit in the other and see wich one gets full first.


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## jkelley69 (Nov 6, 2011)

Sorry i kind of went off there but one thing i forgot to say was i got treated a whole lot better when she thought i wasnt into her anymore and when she thought i was being mean wich was never the case i loved her for her and now im lost.


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## GoodManners (Nov 6, 2011)

jkelley (or anyone else who has ever dealt with what JK is describing, male or female) - have a look at this blog and see if it has some insight

Married Man Sex Life

At the very least it is interesting


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## KILLEROFSAINTS (Nov 6, 2011)

gentleman said:


> bad boys rule .. Always!!
> 
> 
> a club i've enjoyed being apart of since i was 14.


 eddie....prove you have ever touched a woman


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## Killermonkey (Nov 6, 2011)

Because woman respect a man who stand tall and has balls!

Just sayin


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## sofargone561 (Nov 6, 2011)

i slap bitches who dont fix me hot meals


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## Killermonkey (Nov 6, 2011)

Being a little funny boy only takes you so far in life- so far in life as in your last year in college. After that, you should be grown up by now and have learned to act like a man.


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## sofargone561 (Nov 6, 2011)

not to mention you said funnay.... thats not funny bro so apparently your not funny or a badass. damn life sucks for you


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## Killermonkey (Nov 6, 2011)

He pretty much answered his own question in the title of this thread. Any mature woman will tell you that they want boys, they want men. 

If their men are giving them attention then will turn to boys for quick fuck and nothin more. A man is not man for not regulating every aspect of his life. 

Trying to satisfy a relationship down the road, being funny is not going to solve your problems. Being a man that is in charge, can take care of himself, takes no shit from anyone, and deals with shit with a coll head, are all desire able traits that women look for.

Think about this, would expect a funny boy to defend his girlfriend or wife from a bigger and stronger enemy. A man would take on anyone based on principle and vows. 

For all you meatheads (myself included), being funny does not work for us. Nobody wants to laugh at a guys jokes where they know he can kick anyone who is being the joke's ass!


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## sofargone561 (Nov 6, 2011)

Killermonkey said:


> He pretty much answered his own question in the title of this thread. Any mature woman will tell you that they want boys, they want men.
> 
> If their men are giving them attention then will turn to boys for quick fuck and nothin more. A man is not man for not regulating every aspect of his life.
> 
> ...


 being a jacked assholes tends to make people laugh at shit you say anyway so its a win win


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## HialeahChico305 (Nov 7, 2011)

sofargone561 said:


> i slap bitches who dont fix me hot meals



this is translation for "im 18 and single"


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## sofargone561 (Nov 7, 2011)

HialeahChico305 said:


> this is translation for "im *18* and *single*"


 close but no cigar and no. id rather be 18 and single then a chico. do they have free wifi in front of homedepot? shouldnt u be trying to get work and not on your stolen laptop hating us youngins. atleast i get hot meals

 HATER


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